Poopoo peepee and Kids: New fragrance just dropped

New fragrance just dropped

By lavenderpiss - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Australia - North Adelaide

Today, I used my vaporiser to make my house smell like lavender while I went to work. My brother thought it would be funny to pee inside it. My whole house now smells like pissy lavender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 472

You deserved it 4 021

May weddings: Love and blunders
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Same thing different taste

Bad boy

By Shiva - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - France - Niort

Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 780

You deserved it 9 643

Prank protip

By Ca13b - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my brother put pepper spray on my toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 457

You deserved it 4 011

Glade

By stinkystinky - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, after cleaning the whole house, I still couldn't get rid of the foul smell. Later, my roommate revealed his new place to "stash and dry" his socks: The ventilation ducts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 931

You deserved it 964

Close encounters

By Pinkie - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 281

You deserved it 2 715

Piss poor prank

By peedonme - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 261

You deserved it 2 941

Thanks for the info

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 843

You deserved it 611

Self defence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 103

You deserved it 2 479

Surprising

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 20:00

Today, my younger sister had some friends over at ours. I was in the shower but was horrified to realize my clothes and towel were gone. Figuring that she took them, I tried to make it to my room without being seen, but one of her friends came up to use the bathroom. She saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 104

You deserved it 311

The smell test

By sosadstudent - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 098

You deserved it 4 449

Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Ireland - Gorey

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 977

You deserved it 46 583

DaMann360 19

Monday 16 December 2013 9:07

"Thats just nasty" *Cleveland voice

Kruiser 16

Monday 16 December 2013 9:08

Could be worse, it could be poopy lavender

Comments

AmorVitae93 6

Monday 16 December 2013 11:37

Your boyfriend it would go with a few H put punch him in the face or maybe balls the pending on how pissed off I would be

LtBoom 13

Monday 16 December 2013 11:58

I feel so enlightened after reading that... You have a such a beautiful way with words.

mFUNdo21 17

Monday 16 December 2013 23:42

#33 is obviously stoned

turdoblast 21

Monday 16 December 2013 12:19

Piss; still a better scent than lavender.

siggy_mcsigx 22

Monday 16 December 2013 12:27

Stuff cheese slices in the bottom underside of his pillowcase and let him find it for himself...may take a few weeks......

mFUNdo21 17

Monday 16 December 2013 23:43

unless the linen is changed every week...

shhhaaarrron 12

Monday 16 December 2013 12:56

How would anybody in the right mind ever... I don't know how you got through it because I feel gross just thinking about it

Blavock 12

Monday 16 December 2013 13:26

Beat his ******* ass

mxij 13

Monday 16 December 2013 13:52

Well, at least it wasn't the oven this time.

fmlife__x13x 5

Monday 16 December 2013 14:21

at least the lavenders strong enough.

holeyman 8

Monday 16 December 2013 14:24

I use my vaporizer to make my house smell like weed.

Bacondeluxe9000 7

Monday 16 December 2013 15:23

He pissed on your day.

JMichael 25

Monday 16 December 2013 15:28

As revenge piss in his cereal.

Keywords

Management Work Friends Miscellaneous Awkward Health Relatable Healthy Lifestyle Birthday Family Money Gifts Mother in law Parents Public freakouts Education Students Exams Pranks Weird Love Argument AITA Insects Fear Cats Skincare Job interview Jealousy Coworkers

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 4

Today, I found out you can’t lie about having a Master’s Degree in order to get a job. I paid a friend $500 to make a very real looking Master’s diploma from an accredited school. My plan worked well, until they asked me for my official transcripts. Meaning it has to come from the institution directly. FML

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The Top

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You deserved it 1 660

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I agree, your life sucks 27 332

You deserved it 1 572

Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 965

You deserved it 28 314

Same thing different taste

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