Today, I looked over to see my grandfather looking thoughtfully at me. Feeling flattered because he rarely shows affection, I waved at him. He then said, "I was looking out the window" and continued to stare past my head out of the window. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got back home from work and casually asked my dad, "What's up?" He casually replied, "Wishing I'd had a son instead." and stared glassy-eyed at me until I left the room. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML
Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML
Today, I sent my grandfather a picture of me because he hasn't seen me in years. I guess I should wear makeup next time, because he sent back a heavily photoshopped and cropped version and told me how beautiful I look. FML
Today, my grandpa took the family out for dinner and paid for everyone. He paid the bill and my family and I were waiting by the door. I realised I probably should thank him for dinner. I turned around without thinking and give him a big hug, and said, "Thanks for dinner Grandpa." It wasn't my grandpa. FML
Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML
Today, I was riding on my usual bus, when I noticed a man staring at me. I was having a really bad day, and said "Can you please stop staring at me?" He then replied with "I'm just trying to look out the window, and your head is in the way. Don't flatter yourself." FML
Today, my grandpa died. I called my grandma to make sure she was going to be fine. After talking over the phone for 30 minutes or so, I told her goodbye and said, out of habit, "Say hi to grandpa for me". FML
Today, I was at lunch with my grandpa and my sister. My grandpa looks over at my sister and says, "Wow. You're so beautiful." Right after, he turns to me and says, "And you have a nice coat." FML
Today, my grandfather kept on asking me questions about my girlfriend, and was obviously proud of the things he remembered about her. The only thing he couldn't remember is that we broke up. I had to talk with him about our "great relationship" for over an hour. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
At least he didn't spray you with Windex to try to remove the ugly stain blocking his view. That's a start :)
DocBastard 40
Yes, yes! More curmudgeonly old man stories! More!! I'm taking notes so I know just how nasty I can act when I'm that old.
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Comments (43)
unknown_user5566 27
If you are really upset at his lack of affection, you should put in more effort with him. My grandpa is the same way. Maybe suggest a Granpda & Granddaughter date? :)
ManInTheMachine 20
He'd probably say something along the lines of "All my dates have been attractive, and I don't want to break the streak now."
unknown_user5566 27
To which OP could reply, "Well Gramps, looks are genetic. What does that say about you?" :)
pikapikalove 5
That's okay, OP. The FML Community cares about you :D
charvisioku 22
He sounds like my grandma. At a family gathering when I was 14ish, I went up to her and said "Hi, Grandma :)". She looked at me like I'd just said "Hey, Grandma, go play in traffic". Grumpy old nag xD
Zomg_Okay 27
It was probably mostly down to the fact that you said "smiley face" while greeting her.
dogpup4 23
Maybe she thought "Colon bracket" had something to do with her actual colon.
unknown_user5566 27
1- Agreed. Maybe gramps just doesn't show affection to anyone? That's how my grandpa is. My family goes by the phrase "can't teach an old dog new tricks". OP, even if your grandpa doesn't always SHOW affection, I'm sure he still loves you. Just remember that. :)
jsl6728 2
Or maybe Op deserves it. They did say he never shows affection, so why kid yourself?
CallMeMcFeelii 14
My grandpa once beat me with a stick because I picked their neighbors roses for my grandma. That's one of my only memories of him. Just be glad that your pappy is still alive. Try what 1 said, talk about all these yuppie cars that run on electricity.
unknown_user5566 27
25- What could OP have possibly done to deserve this? I think most everyone deserves to be shown love and affection from their family members.
sarah6786 14
This sounds like my grandpa, he hates me so much that once I walked in the room and he smiled at me and I was so startled I passed out.
Sharkitaxrscary 12
Just give him a hug next time.
_Breezie_ 13
Haha sounds like my family xD