Today, my hubby and I realised that the most excitement in our lives this week has been watching how far the disabled spider that got shut in the door has made it around our bathroom. We were both watching all week and have only just told each other. No communication and spider voyeurs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML
Today, I got up and started getting ready for work. As I entered the bathroom, I noticed a moth in the shower. Feeling generous, I caught the moth in a cup and took it to the front porch. I released the moth and watched it fly away… into a giant spider and its web. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, after having a 3-day vacation and feeling a bit bummed that it was over, I got home to find a black widow watching her babies hatch in my office window. FML
Today, I finally conquered my fear of spiders by catching one in a cup and releasing it outside. Feeling proud of my bravery, I proudly showed my accomplishment to my roommate, only to realize it wasn't a spider but a piece of lint. I screamed louder than I would have for a spider. FML
Today, my significant other woke at 4:30 a.m. to me crying about a spider in the bathroom. I have an intense fear of spiders; he was super nice and took care of it for me. He even walked me out to my car. I started to calm down driving to work, but when I got there what do I see on the door handle but a spider. I'm still shaking. FML
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
Today, while showering, I noticed a spider drowning in the bath. Spiders gross me out but I felt a moral duty to save it. Reluctantly, I scooped it up and carried it to safety. Then I realised it was my housemate's pubes. FML
Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML
Today, I asked my husband to deal with the very large spider in our kitchen. Rather than a newspaper or a slipper, he went after it with an aerosol can and a lighter. The spider is now dead, but so are the wall and cupboards in my kitchen. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
So, what's going on? Keep us posted! Are you leaving it dead flies to eat since it can't climb its web anymore? And are you leaving a TV on when you're away, so it won't get bored?
SirEnigM0nk 22
Does Peter Parker need to enter rehab?
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
So, what's going on? Keep us posted! Are you leaving it dead flies to eat since it can't climb its web anymore? And are you leaving a TV on when you're away, so it won't get bored?
SirEnigM0nk 22
Does Peter Parker need to enter rehab?