Nunya · 3 January 2025, 15:00 ·Sydney, Australia

Just my luck

Today, after walking on the beach for an hour with a friend, I noticed I'd lost my car keys. Thirty minutes from my friend's house, three hours from mine. It was getting dark & the tide was rising. We retraced our steps with no luck; the keys could’ve been washed away. I'd also locked my keys in the car earlier this week an hour from home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 207 You deserved it 508

1 comment Share

poopface82 · 2 January 2025, 12:00 ·United States

Bad start

Today, after my girlfriend’s grandmother died over the holidays, both my kids are sick, my beloved aunt is on death’s doorstep and, to top it off, my car’s brakes are shot. I don’t know if I will ever not be stressed the hell out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460 You deserved it 102

1 comment Share

Newny Cooper · 31 December 2024, 20:00 ·Roselle, United States

Don't look back in anger

Today, I saw a Tesla truck in my rear-view mirror and thought, "Oh, look how cool the front looks!" Five seconds later it rear-ended me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397 You deserved it 206

4 comments Share

Anonymous · 28 December 2024, 12:00 ·Lower Hutt, New Zealand

I blame the parents

Today, I picked up my idiot 20 year-old son from a party. He was shit-faced drunk and managed to drop his vape out the window as I was driving. He tried to open the door of the moving car to get out and look for it, and I had to grab him and pull him back in. Legally, this moron is an adult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469 You deserved it 206

2 comments Share

Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff ·New Zealand

Rainy day

Today, I slipped and fell in mud while running from the car to inside to avoid getting wet in a torrential downpour. I was running from the limo, in my wedding dress, to the church for my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 068 You deserved it 7 927

237 comments Share

Anonymous · 20 December 2024, 12:00 ·Holden, United States

Many such cases

Today, I had to use my husband's vehicle. He has been spiraling into a mean, bigoted man. I got into his vehicle and the radio was on a station that was spewing weird stereotypes of women, and making fun of anyone who is not a hard supporter of a certain orange politician/businessman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619 You deserved it 298

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 13 December 2024, 12:00

The line must go up

Today, my boss sacked me because I only sold 3 cars last month. He made no allowance for the fact we’re in such a rural location we only had 3 customers actually walk in the door, and I sold a car to all 3 of them. That’s a 100% success rate. What else could I do, drag customers in? FML

I agree, your life sucks 733 You deserved it 82

1 comment Share

RdL · This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff ·United States

Sick ride, dude

Today, my parents said that they bought me a car. I had been begging for one for a year and they always said that I would have to pay for it myself. I got really excited and went to the garage to see my new ride. It was a Hot Wheels car with a note saying, "Save your money". FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 106 You deserved it 31 852

168 comments Share

hehe · This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Snow day confusion

Today, I went to shovel the massive amount of snow that was on our car. After spending time in the cold wind, I finally finished, realizing it wasn't my car. It was an identical car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 065 You deserved it 6 471

68 comments Share

Anonymous · 8 December 2024, 03:00 ·Sunderland, United Kingdom

Practice makes perfect

Today, I had to come to terms with the truth that I'm absolutely terrible at parallel parking. After three failed attempts, I finally gave up and parked in a spot labeled "No Parking" just to make it stop. Of course, a car pulled in right behind me and blocked me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141 You deserved it 589

1 comment Share

Rob · 5 December 2024, 15:00 ·Swindon, United Kingdom

Where am I going?

Today, I asked a stranger for directions and then drove in the opposite direction they'd pointed to, all because my ADHD brain did that thing where I couldn't pay attention past their first instruction, which to me sounded like, "Take the first left, then the second right, then fla flafla fla flaflafla." FML

I agree, your life sucks 271 You deserved it 354

2 comments Share

Chyna · 4 December 2024, 15:00 ·Manchester, United Kingdom

Good boy

Today, I got locked out of my car while the engine was idling. The "good news"? My dog inside the car thought this was the funniest thing ever and barked happily every time I tried to open it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328 You deserved it 259

0 comment Share

noyodel · This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff ·Italy

Safe travels, Grandma

Today, I had been planning a family trip for months. My father had all his bags packed, ready to go in the car. He had my grandmother's ashes in his suitcase, and planned to spread them on a mountain. This morning our car was broken into and everything was stolen. The thief stole my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 030 You deserved it 3 467

135 comments Share

Too tall for this shit · 30 November 2024, 22:00 ·Fresno, United States

Fiat 500 woes

Today, I parked, then opened my car door to get out, and somehow managed to practically knock myself out by banging my head on the frame, then on the car door that had slammed back into my forehead as I was still reeling from hitting the roof. A guy walking by asked if I was okay while trying not to laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358 You deserved it 128

0 comment Share

Anonymous · 30 November 2024, 16:00 ·Allentown, United States

No turkey for you

Today, I was on my way to a Thanksgiving dinner, with my dog in her seat in the front of my car. On the entrance ramp to the highway, my rear wheels spun to the left, and then my car spun completely around and hit the guardrail. My car is totaled. I'm broke, but at least my dog wasn't hurt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407 You deserved it 149

1 comment Share

Kevin · 29 November 2024, 12:00 ·United States

Move!

Today, I got stuck in traffic and angrily honked at the car in front of me. Then I realized it was a hearse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 You deserved it 672

1 comment Share

Harj · 27 November 2024, 22:00 ·Edgware, United Kingdom

I'm an asshole

Today, after filling fuel in my car, I drove off. The guy behind me left almost at the time. He was behind me, beeping his horn and flashing his lights. I pulled up alongside him at the lights and rolled down the window to ask him what the fuck his problem was. He promptly proceeded to tell me that my fuel cap was still open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 You deserved it 727

0 comment Share

Anonymous · 27 November 2024, 00:00 ·Canada

Carpool karaoke

Today, I was singing loudly in my car at a red light, completely oblivious. When I finished the song, I turned to see a bus full of passengers watching (and also some of them filming) my performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213 You deserved it 437

0 comment Share

Crash · This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff ·United States

Beep beep

Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 290 You deserved it 62 678

76 comments Share

Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff ·United States

Tonight we're gonna party like it's 1999

Today, I took my best friend to an '80s party. She drank too much and ended up puking all over the interior and exterior of my car, as well as inside my right legwarmer on the 30 mile trip back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 441 You deserved it 4 765

74 comments Share

Anonymous · 17 November 2024, 00:00

Wild ride

Today, an absolute cretin of a lorry driver ran into the back of me as I was slowing down for an orange light about to go red. My car is totalled and he had the nerve to tell the police I had brake checked him on purpose, probably for an insurance scam, and that it was all my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 538 You deserved it 77

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 16 November 2024, 22:00 ·United States

Stoking too close to the sun

Today, I was stoked to show my new car to my friends that I pulled into the parking lot a bit too fast, attempting to look cool. I accidentally hit the curb and ended up scratching the entire front bumper on a trash can that I didn't see. Now I have a busted up bumper, and my friends will probably never let me forget it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 You deserved it 779

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 15 November 2024, 22:00 ·Tulsa, United States

Gunged

Today, on my way home, a truck driver was speeding next to me and as he passed I saw his truck was the kind that takes livestock to be butchered. I was thinking that I didn’t look to see if there were animals in there. Suddenly, brown items hit my windshield. Yes, it didn’t "hit the fan," it hit my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360 You deserved it 93

0 comment Share

drivingmecrazy · This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff ·Sacramento, United States

High speed car chase

Today, I called 911 to report a drunk driver. The operator yelled at me for following the guy and told me to get off the phone because I shouldn't be driving with a phone to my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 676 You deserved it 7 519

62 comments Share

Ouch · 9 November 2024, 15:00 ·United States

Not the brightest moggy

Today, my cat got outside and had the bright idea to walk in the middle of the road, right as a car was coming. The driver didn't notice him, so I had to sprint over there, leap into the road, and toss my cat to safety. He's fine, aside from being soaked (he landed in a puddle), but I've felt better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 369 You deserved it 123

2 comments Share

pgmonster · This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff ·San Francisco, United States

Wreckless Eric

Today, I backed into an expensive SUV only minutes after my boss congratulated me for being the only employee to not wreck a company car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 226 You deserved it 5 541

47 comments Share

Anonymous · 15 October 2024, 22:00 ·United States

Am I being detained?

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125 You deserved it 656

4 comments Share

Man in car · 11 October 2024, 12:00 ·United States

Panic mode activated

Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 194 You deserved it 329

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 9 October 2024, 12:00 ·Boulder, United States

Bad day, huh?

Today, I got a flat tire. While trying to change it, I dropped my phone down a storm drain. I had to hitchhike home, and the guy who picked me up told me he wasn't even sure I wasn't a serial killer. I told him I wasn't. He then said, "That's what a serial killer would say." FML

I agree, your life sucks 359 You deserved it 130

2 comments Share

Kevin · 8 October 2024, 12:00 ·Ottawa–Gatineau, Canada

Cars these days…

Today, my relatively new car locked down, with my keys inside of it, while it was still running. In a panic because it was getting dark and I was already low on fuel, I called a locksmith. He showed up and told me he needed to see some ID before unlocking the car. My ID was in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442 You deserved it 117

1 comment Share