Happy Caturday!
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Brooklyn
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By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Brooklyn
By Anonymous - 30/08/2013 00:48 - United Kingdom
By pizza girl - 30/08/2013 04:33 - United States - Nettleton
By rapunzel3416 - 30/08/2013 09:23 - United States - Colton
By itsellie27 - 30/08/2013 14:44 - United Kingdom - London
By Anonymous - 31/08/2013 07:24 - United Kingdom - Woodford Green
By nevercatchabreak - 31/08/2013 08:16 - United States - Burgettstown
By Anonymous - 31/08/2013 16:12 - United States - Modesto
By criminal tit offender - 31/08/2013 16:25 - United States - Bessemer
By Anonymous - 31/08/2013 20:52 - Norway - Nesoddtangen
By embarrassedmom - 31/08/2013 23:48 - United States
By SplishSplash - 01/09/2013 01:21 - United States
By Rapunzel1974 - 01/09/2013 04:29 - United States - Gulfport
I'm the OP. I'm the one with the Fabulous Fingerbiters. These chickens aren't food: they're overindulged pets. Each one has a name, so chicken stew isn't an option. I've named them after various vaudeville stars or actresses because they're a lot of feathery drama queens. Actually, biting the hand that feeds them is right in line with the entertainment-industry theme I chose when naming them. A chicken bite from a baby bird isn't really painful at all because their little beaks are so soft. Even an adult bird's peck isn't painful in the same way a dog or cat bite is painful. They can't break the skin, although if they get you in the face it can leave a scratch or welt. A parrot, by contrast, can take your finger off. Chickens just aren't strong enough. These are going to be lovely laying hens. They're just a bit cheeky. I think I can break them of the habit by switching for a while to grass instead of mealworms, by *not* dropping the goodies no matter what, and moving on to the second phase of training, where I train them to hop onto my lap and sit there to be fed and petted. When training a chicken, it's important to use food as a reward. They're not like dogs and they don't consider attention a reward. They don't even consider petting a reward until they're conditioned to do so, because it's not a normal behavior or sensation for them. But it's straight-up operant conditioning, right out of B.F. Skinner
By Anonymous - 01/09/2013 04:40 - Canada - Saint Albert
By happyturtle - 01/09/2013 09:57 - Croatia
By jfanous - 01/09/2013 10:40 - United States - Bakersfield
haha, yeah i'm the OP. didn't know you need an account to comment...but I just wanted to clear up something. I didn't want my parents to pay, a simple "you got in" would have been nice. I was planning on doing ROTC and letting Uncle Sam handle my tuition.
By NotGabe - 01/09/2013 14:25 - United States - Houston
OP here. Looks like I caused some confusion, so let me clear it up. In the US, the changeable tops of a bottle are called nipples. Basically, a female customer gave my **** a twist.
By Anonymous - 01/09/2013 16:34 - United States - Washington
By Anonymous - 01/09/2013 22:35 - United States - Cypress
By WaltTheFuckDad - 01/09/2013 23:06 - United States - Salida
Yay I'm the OP I'm happy this got posted. I'm 22 and coach girls volleyball. A volunteer basketball coach didn't recognize me and thought I was a student. This happens when we go to away games too. The coaches of the other teams will tell me to leave until my coach is here and even some high school students think I'm on the team. I think it's pretty funny and am glad I still look young.