DeadlySyrup

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Deadlysyrup's favorite FMLs

By CanWeAllGetOne - 13/11/2013 06:40 - United States - Houston

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

agreeclassic 52 928

vote type 1 14 089

By Carebeareatu - 14/09/2013 05:42 - United States - North Richland Hills

Today, my sister came out of her room sobbing uncontrollably. When I asked what was wrong, she put her fingers in my face and asked if they smelled like pickles, and if "that's normal for girls". They did. It's not. FML

agreeclassic 47 580

vote type 1 3 591

Carebeareatu app_comment_confession_title

Carebeareatu 23

Sunday 15 September 2013 0:58

op here. I don't know why they did. I dont want to know why they did.

By fartz - 31/08/2013 06:04 - United States

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

agreeclassic 48 531

vote type 1 8 110

By ven980 - 04/09/2013 07:00 - United States - Muskogee

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail after he punched a convenience store clerk in the face for running out of Cheetos. FML

agreeclassic 44 487

vote type 1 3 777

ven980 app_comment_confession_title

ven980 10

Wednesday 4 September 2013 19:48

Hey OP here. I just wanted to add a little detail to this story. My brother had just come from a bachelor party and was very drunk so he called me for a ride. He punched the clerk because he was rude to us and yes I did leave him there overnight

By fml - 03/09/2013 06:31 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

agreeclassic 55 552

vote type 1 12 109