hassi158

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35 years-old
Tuesday 19 February 1991
Single

About Hassi158

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Beginner

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Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Happy ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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YDI Master

You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.

Judgmental

You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.

A new thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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Mobility

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Work is a 4-letter word

Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy month-versary

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The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

I liked to the power of 20

You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.

The list of badges to find

Hassi158's favorite FMLs

Backhanded

By Anonymous - 02/07/2012 05:47 - United States - Gainesville

Today, my mother-in-law said I wasn't the type she expected her son to marry, as he's always dated cheerleaders and model types. I must have looked offended, so she added, "I mean they weren't smart like you." So, I might be smart but I'm the ugliest girl my husband has ever been with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 525

You deserved it 3 180

By FuckYou - 02/07/2012 06:07 - United States - Santa Maria

Today, I fell down my stairs while holding a carton of eggs I was going to use to egg my ex-boyfriend's house. Karma's definitely a bitch to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 657

You deserved it 54 109

By wife of a shithead - 06/07/2012 17:44 - Norway - Oslo

Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 436

You deserved it 4 801

By momolee - 07/07/2012 19:13 - Saudi Arabia - Riyadh

Today, a woman asked why my daughter doesn't look remotely like me. I just smiled and shrugged it off, but the truth is that she looks exactly like I did before I got my botched plastic surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 035

You deserved it 42 442

By Anonymous - 01/08/2012 09:02 - United States

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 771

You deserved it 6 609

By Anonymous - 08/08/2012 17:15 - United States - Chagrin Falls

Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "Happy Birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 424

You deserved it 4 283

By Deaththreat101 - 08/08/2012 20:39 - United States - Evanston

Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 404

You deserved it 44 676

By calivianya - 28/08/2012 04:49 - United States - Greensboro

Today, there's a cricket in my apartment. I don't know if I'm more annoyed by the fact that it somehow got up three flights of stairs to get here, or that my cat is so excited about it that he's jumping on me and howling in my face to announce the cricket's presence instead of killing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 143

You deserved it 2 200

calivianya tells us more.

calivianya 29

Tuesday 28 August 2012 18:02

Just so you guys know, I have a whole lot of furniture. I'm pretty sure the cricket was hiding under one of the pieces of furniture, but every time I got near my couch, ottoman, armchair, side table, or bookcase, it stopped chirping. It was pretty hard to tell where it was coming from!

By merissa22 - 01/09/2012 17:37 - United States - Chicago

Today, I found out that the "vines" I was cutting down this morning were actually poison oak. I can only see out of one eye, and I'm virtually unrecognizable due to the facial swelling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 284

You deserved it 4 176

merissa22 tells us more.

merissa22 5

Sunday 2 September 2012 17:39

nothing like a shot in my ass after trying to sum up the courage to go out in public won't help

By onorexveritas - 06/09/2012 16:54 - United States - Modesto

Today, the acne on one side of my face has flared up at the corners of my mouth, making me look just like The Joker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 459

You deserved it 2 447

onorexveritas tells us more.

onorexveritas 23

Thursday 6 September 2012 23:00

it sucks ass lmao but its kina funny to look at xD

By killmenow - 10/09/2012 17:52 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 285

You deserved it 77 805

Thanks…

By Anonymous - 15/09/2012 18:34 - United States - Metairie

Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 612

You deserved it 34 469

By Missusluv313 - 17/09/2012 11:25 - United States - Merrillville

Today, I went for my follow-up appointment with my surgeon. He walked into the room and said, "I thought you died." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 395

You deserved it 1 978

Missusluv313 tells us more.

Missusluv313 9

Monday 17 September 2012 18:48

Hello everyone! Yes, he was joking. I just didn't find that shit funny. And he actually is a good doctor. But to make up for it, he gave me extra time off from work. I don't think he would do that to/for everybody, but I work at that hospital.

By holyshitbatman - 22/09/2012 14:06 - United States - Chicago

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 567

You deserved it 29 797

By Valentine_Beauty - 06/10/2012 08:58 - United States

Today, I wore a dress that I bought last weekend to work, thinking how I liked it and it fitted me perfectly, until someone at work told me that I was actually wearing a nightie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 980

You deserved it 23 685

Valentine_Beauty tells us more.

Valentine_Beauty 5

Sunday 7 October 2012 4:38

Hi yeah i know a lot of ya'll are thinking of how dumb am i to wear a nightie and not know the difference..for one thing, it was sold with other dresses and no it's not see through, it actually has an underskirt and the reason my colleague commented was due to the lacy neckline.. and i actually paired it off with a slacks and a cardigan, so no, i'm not working in a brothel though that made me LOL...people can have the silliest idea.. i'm still a bit convinced it's a dress, but nevertheless i'm not wearing it out any more.. cheers!