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Classic

By Anonymous - 29/03/2026 12:00

Today, I got a strand of dental floss stuck in my teeth. The only thing that hurts more than my mouth is the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 70

Walk it off

By Anonymous - 06/04/2023 12:00 - Ireland

Today, after running a marathon, I was knackered but feeling great. I was walking to my car when I stepped on a shard of glass and had to go to the emergency room to get it removed. I ended up missing the marathon after-party and had to spend the rest of the day in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 144

Wait until she's left the room at least!

By Anonymous - 08/09/2024 20:00 - United States - Truckee

Today, I messed up by forgetting that reflections on glasses can make a private experience VERY public. I only this realized after my mom asked what I was looking at; she definitely saw a lot more dick than she would have liked. I feel like such a perv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 546

Keep your eyes on the road

By Just drive - 09/04/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, as an Uber driver, I try to make small talk with passengers by guessing where they were from based on their accent. I got it completely wrong. This one said, “I grew up two streets from here.” The rest of the ride was silent except for my GPS telling me where to go, which felt appropriate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 493

Neighborhood watch

By Anonymous - 12/04/2026 15:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, we have a man prowling the neighborhood, soliciting donations to a fake charity, all while he is casing the neighborhood and asking us about our valuables. The cops refuse to do anything about it, except tell us we will probably get robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 80

Antiques roadshow

By Anonymous - 21/04/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, we needed to get an antique dresser downstairs for sale. While I was fetching a cart to wheel it down safely, my wife and boys decided to impress me by carrying it. The plaster on the walls now needs repair, as does the banister and glass front door. Plus the dresser is now unsellable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 61

Family secrets

By Anonymous - 22/09/2024 12:00 - United States - Marysville

Today, my sister accused me of hacking into her phone because I helped her connect to a WiFi network a while ago, and she'd completely forgotten about it. I only found that out when my mom accidentally leaked it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 70

Interesting design choice

By Graphic design - 24/04/2026 03:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I sent a final logo to a client after weeks of revisions. They loved it and immediately posted it on their website. An hour later I realized I'd left a placeholder font in one section that replaced a key letter with a random symbol. Their brand name now included what looked like a tiny alien face. It stayed live for six hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 295

Some fun was had

By Anonymous - 24/09/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, I got home from a holiday to find out that my flatmate had thrown a party. Everything seemed fine at first, then I noticed that someone had taken a dump in my running shoes that were in my bedroom closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 85

Cruel dilemma

By Anonymous - 26/04/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I have both gout and diabetic neuropathy, meaning my feet are both too numb to feel pain while also being too painful to walk. It is not a fun sensation. Not at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 93

Vicious circle

By Anonymous - 27/09/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend's most frequent OCD tic is also the biggest trigger of my misophonia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 101

Get back here

By Ubermensch - 10/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I picked up a passenger from the airport who insisted he was late. Drove fast, dropped him off, felt efficient, then noticed his phone on the back seat. After circling trying to find him, I ended up back at the airport, where he was waiting because I’d taken him to the wrong terminal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 325

Duly noted

By Anonymous - 16/05/2026 22:00 - United States - DeLand

Today, my boss watched me get my waistband hooked on a safety hazard in the warehouse. She included it in the safety report. FML

I agree, your life sucks 279

You deserved it 91

Full of himself

By Anonymous - 21/05/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, during a Tinder date, the guy spent a solid hour talking about the Tinder date he went on yesterday with someone else. Honestly, I only stayed to the end because the restaurant was excellent. The guy was actually confused when I split the bill and didn’t want to have sex with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 74

Get on with it

By Bored - 18/06/2026 03:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I went to play a game with a friend. Turns out he's the sort of dude who, when he first installs a game, gets obsessive with making sure the settings are EXACTLY right. We got maybe five minutes of gameplay in between menu sliders, hardware tweaks, and unofficial drivers and patches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 93

Never going back

By Anonymous - 14/11/2024 22:00 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I had to awkwardly stand next to my ex in a grocery store because our self-checkout machines froze at the same time. Our break up was quite acrimonious so we both tried to play it cool while the attendant came to fix them. They took their fucking time as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 119

Noise annoys

By Stacey02 - 23/06/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, a quiet afternoon at the library turned stressful when my phone started blasting music. Every attempt to silence it somehow increased the volume. After seconds of panic, I realised the sound wasn't coming from my phone. It was a kid's toy buried somewhere in my backpack after a visit from my niece. The reading room people still glared at me like I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 94

Maybe I'll stay home

By Anonymous - 16/06/2026 22:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, while I was doing my hair and makeup, I somehow managed to spray myself in the right eye with hairspray, and in the left eye with makeup setting spray. I left the house with two very bloodshot eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8

You deserved it 4

Carpool karaoke

By Anonymous - 27/11/2024 00:00 - Canada

Today, I was singing loudly in my car at a red light, completely oblivious. When I finished the song, I turned to see a bus full of passengers watching (and also some of them filming) my performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 434

You snooze, you lose

By Anonymous - 13/12/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I procrastinated so much on asking out the guy I like that this morning I had to wish him a happy first wedding anniversary. Yes, I procrastinated so much that he had time to date someone else, get engaged and married, and make it to the first anniversary, and I still love him. God I’m pathetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 867

Nom nom nom

By Fern - 06/01/2025 00:00 - Germany

Today, I used a new body wash that smells like vanilla cookies. My dog spent the entire day chasing me around and trying to lick my arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 169

Confused, lost

By Anonymous - 26/01/2025 03:00 - Switzerland - Neuchatel

Today, I missed my train. I was actually on the right platform but realized my mistake two minutes after it had left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 239

Treat yourself!

By Jenniwithani - 20/08/2023 14:00 - United States

Today, I'd planned a DIY 'treat yourself' spa day at home. I put on a face mask and settled to relax in a bubble bath. Just as I was getting out of the tub, I slipped on the wet floor and crashed into the wall, leaving a perfect imprint of the face mask on the tiles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 588

You deserved it 137

Too trusting

By Anonymous - 07/09/2023 00:02 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I tried to stifle a sneeze while on the train and instead shat myself a little bit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 657

You deserved it 201

Drive thru

By ToxicFamily - 17/02/2025 09:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, my entitled brother-in-law called me unannounced as I was having lunch and asked if I had food for him and his wife. I said, "The food I have at home will only be enough for my husband." Now I'm the villain for not cooking enough for sudden unexpected mealtime visitors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 552

You deserved it 84

Tipping point

By Tipped off - 06/03/2025 00:00 - United States - Benson

Today, I helped a lady carry her grocery bags to her car. She was so grateful that she offered me a tip. I refused, but she insisted. When I finally took it, I looked at the bill to see she'd given me $1. I smiled and said thank you, but she looked at me like I’d just robbed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 139

Knackered

By I'mtoooldforthis - 08/03/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, my toddler is sick yet again. The only way he will sleep is me walking with him. It's 2:30 am, and I'm supposed to start back to full time employment in… 5 hours. Parenthood is not for the weak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 140

Embrace modernity, reject tradition

By Anonymous - 02/06/2022 10:00

Today, I got to explain reusable period underwear to my mom, who once had to wear sanitary belts. She was horrified by the idea of underwear specifically designed to be bled into, as opposed to all the accidental bleeding into underwear not designed for it that happens every time I try to sleep on my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 903

You deserved it 143

Briefs

By Anonymous - 17/03/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I went to donate some of my old underwear that I never wear and were in too nice a condition to throw in a dumpster. I was given the runaround by two different people who had no clue where the clothes donation box was, until I gave up and finally found it in the opposite direction. That took me an hour and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 370

Carplayed out

By Anonymous - 04/04/2025 15:00 - Australia

Today, I couldn’t find my phone as I left work, but knew it was on me since CarPlay connected. Later, the music cut out speeding up onto the freeway. I then recalled placing it on the roof as I loaded up the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 185

You deserved it 516

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The Top

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 4 years in front of the sell-out crowd at the baseball game, but at the security checkpoint, the security guard made me take the ring out and open it after I walked through the metal detector. No need to say it, worst proposal ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 018

You deserved it 1 912

Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 642

You deserved it 9 562

Today, I attended the funeral of a close friend. Most of the other guests were openly grinning and joking around, and the guy in front of me kept muttering, "That's what she said!" during the eulogy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 069

You deserved it 3 196

Today, I received my year 12 yearbook. After such a bad year of let downs, it wasn’t surprising that the school fucked it up and put the previous year's group photo in it instead of ours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 104

Today, I found out the guy I was talking and mutually flirty with is married. I was under the impression that he was divorced, up until when he told me that he's married and assumed that I knew. He says he's in a loveless marriage because his wife cheated and they're staying together for their little kid. WTF? FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 170

Today, I was forced to come in to work early in the morning. For me, that means I will have a pounding migraine, vomiting, and diarrhea for at least the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 289