When you have to raise the bar... By Lewis - 27/12/2018 19:00 - France - Paris Not much though... Just a bit higher. I agree, your life sucks 262 You deserved it 114 Share Tweet Share
Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 115 You deserved it 15 391
Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML I agree, your life sucks 51 081 You deserved it 6 561
Today, my email got hacked and sent all my contacts something for Viagra. My husband thinks I really sent it to him on purpose and now won't even talk to me. FML I agree, your life sucks 31 185 You deserved it 3 295
Today, my ex-wife, who I have a 1000-yard restraining order against since she threatened my new wife and our kids, moved into a house down the street. The police say they can't do anything because her house is more than 1000 yards from mine. It's 1012 yards away. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 752 You deserved it 236
Today, my new boyfriend told me he was having a “swamp day”. Apparently, it’s a day where for some reason, no matter how thoroughly he wipes his ass, he will need to wipe it again every 30 minutes, as shit continually leaks out of him and turns his ass crack “swampy.” I think I threw up a little. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 575 You deserved it 165
Today, it's been a week since I flew to Scotland to attend a writer's retreat and then go to WorldCon to see friends and try and sell the book I just finished. I tested positive for Covid the first day of the retreat, and every day since. I already missed the retreat. Now it looks like I'll be missing the con, too. Sigh. FML I agree, your life sucks 462 You deserved it 114
Savage
she sounded like a lamb after kissing that bar with her head.....