Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home for his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML
Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML
Today, my son came running in, saying he had a project due tomorrow. I asked when it was assigned; he said two weeks ago. I refused to help, saying that he failed to act responsibly and had to live with the consequences. Now he's throwing a tantrum and my wife is screaming at me. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me filming a Harlem Shake video. He stared for a moment, then said, "Son, I don't have a problem with homosexuals, but… nevermind", shook his head and walked out. FML
Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML
Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML
Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML
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Top comments
OhDearBetrayal 25
He's a little late for that.
Silly_Lilly6969 23
The poor elderly. After they've lived so long they get harassed by a teenager to do a Harlem shake video.
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Comments (92)
c4rpi0 20
Threat?? Dang and harlem shake videos are kinda old now
jackiemora 18
My question how did he threat them?
c4rpi0 20
Haha exactly I'm pretty sure everyone is curious what the threat was
OptimusVader 23
The kid is automatically an idiot not because he wanted to make a Harlem Shake video, but because he had the unmoral gall to threaten the elderly. The bastard.
jackiemora 18
Something like: "Harlem shake or no bingo!" Cause how else would he do it! ( if it wasn't a violent threat, hoping it wasn't)
stevothedevo 25
You all have two choices, 1) shake your asses Harlem style, or 2) pull a week worth of landscaping duties.
\ 28
The gene pool has too much genetic urine in it. Time for more chlorine.
\ 28
I said chlorine, not gas!
NickaPLZ 26
FYL for sure, but as for him, he deserved it.
kelseythompson 27
Your son seems awesome
chanellgymnast 17
Never was a fan of the Harlem Shake.
Psycho_Babydoll 26
I know the the "YDI for raising him that way" comments are coming, so I would just like to say right now that you can be the best parent in the world and still have little to no control over your childs actions... your offspring are individual people, and teenagers can be stupid as ****. So OP, I'm gonna say FYL because having a moron for a kid sucks.
tjv3 10
This is why animals sometimes eat their young
challan 19
Just another child that didn't get his ass beat enough, if ever. Yell at me if you want people, but you need to be raised to show respect. My mom wouldn't have taken that from me.
EVnIAS 13
If I have any I wouldn't beat my children but I would show them to respect their elders respect. I have a loud voice that scares kids any way so I don't need to.
challan 19
Most times threats work enough, but they need to know that you'll spank that butt. I coach, and my little guys and gals that have unattentive parents, or ones that let the child walk all over them, are hellions. I ALWAYS know which kids are raised with a firm but gentle hand.
CharresBarkrey 16
37 - It's not 100% parenting. My parents didn't hit me, yell at me, or anything like that, and I was a very well behaved kid. I was just super shy. So don't go jumping to assumptions that parents are good or bad based on their child's actions.
Shrike 24
That's funny, challan, because your parents seem to have raised a clueless, arrogant shitstain. I mean, I'm much the same, but at least I'm not quite on the same level of hypocritical fuckface about it.
Inked0803 12
Wow you raised a champ
stevothedevo 25
Chump*
Atchoo 8
"Shitty genes" has nothing to do with it. He's your kid; he's your responsibility. Man up.
noreallywhat 17
I really hope you took away all electronic devices and grounded him from the internet for at least 6 months. Even if its for homework, it maybe the fastest way to do research but librarys still exsist. Unfortunatly for you you have to find a way to make sure he is supervised at all times.
NoDontKillMe 19
*unfortunately *libraries
Ambience138 11
Talk about disciplinary overkill.