By freezingggg - 23/09/2011 14:33 - Reserved

Today, like always, my parents are such tightwads that they refused to turn the heating system on, despite the ball-freezing temperatures. I was so cold, I had to resort to warming my hands up over the toaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 153
You deserved it 3 695

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Toasters scare the shit out of me when they finish.

Rico_Mal1116 0

Well I bet you feel toasty now!


Toasters scare the shit out of me when they finish.

Shit* lol

Damn_Hippster 11

I hope nothing was in the toaster when you did that.

How about when Enonymous finishes on your face? Probably isn't scary at all....

Turn your stove on max, it warms the place up quick;)

Damn_Hippster 11

OP could always set his house on fire. That'll warm the place up!

chell1894 13

No matter how much I prepare myself it always scares the shit out of me when it's done

When op starts helping out with the electric or gas bill I'm sure you can have at it with the thermostat.

so get a job and contribute, dick

The only way to not be afraid of it is to put ur headphones in and close your eyes

RedSharpieInk 5

So...were your balls, like, legit frozen?

If it was ball freezing temp then you should have had your balls over the toaster, not your hands.. Save the most important bits first :-)

33, lol me too! It makes me jump every time

cuddlebunny3548 11

Omg me too! No matter how many times I tell myself it's going to pop up, I still jump.

I swear my boyfriend is the OP

ImFrackinBored 13

It's the exact opposite here in AZ o.o

#59. Yeah let's all insult the OP when we know nothing of the situation, other than the fact he's cold as fuck and his parents won't let him turn the heating on.. How do you know he doesn't have a job and doesn't contribute? Get outta here

Toast your own hands. You feel the heat effect 10 folds

GrammarNazzzzzi 6

Then you'll be in the hospital where heat is just an illusion and you'll freeze your ass off

Why would you toast your own hands?

rexgar2000 10

why couldn't she just buy a personal heater? geeze they make things so complicated.

Rico_Mal1116 0

Well I bet you feel toasty now!

judices 0

I see what you did there

that was punny!

FlyingLazerWALRU 0

All these puns...

go to a friends house.

ahawk 2

He don't have any

Epikouros 31

Erm... where do you live? New Zealand, where it's winter? Alaska? Siberia?

New Zealand is in spring now. Nice try.

Alexisthebestest 16

And Alaska is not in a permanent winter.

superangryandy 2

You forgot Antarctica.

Its actually in the low 30s currently in northern Minnesota.

perdix 29

Why don't you squat on the toaster and thaw out your frozen balls? If you have a toaster with wide bagel-ready slots, or tiny nuts, you can probably get your balls way down into the toaster for energy-efficient warming.

kickazz16 15

Lol, that'd be efficient :)

Not what I recommend. Caught my pubes on fire and scorched my nads doing that.

trellz17 19

Grab a blanket or put a hoodie on. Or just cut the heat on. What are they gonna do, kick you out?

Another alternative would be to light a fire on the stove!

Or turn it on?

boil some water on the stove or just sit in a hot bath then get out n bundle up!

my mom wont turn on the ac which is worse. when your cold you can layer when your hot well...theres only so much you can do

Yup, I'd rather be cold than hot

I dont even hav ac bitch

superangryandy 2

Ever drive through the Mohave with a broken heater that magically stays on? IT SUCKS ASSCHEEK.

Theres plenty of stuff were as little cloths as possible,go to friends house