Love: Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in...

By WolfAvenge - United States - Phoenix

Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in me by calling me pretty. I was so shocked that instead of saying thank you, I hid behind the nearest object and promptly giggle-snorted. FML

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WolfAvenge tells us more :

I actually do have his number! We go to film school together but haven't hung out much. We were at a shoot for a fashion show. I totally plan on talking with him more, maybe asking to go out on a date soon too ;) Since I joined the film club we will be seeing a lot of each other from now on anyway. I just want to hang out with him more first though, but I'm definitely interested if he still is XD

Love

This Charming Man

Get me away from here, I'm dying

Healthcare is broken

By Anonymous - 1/9/2020 17:01 - Germany

Packaging

Today, I was cleaning up after my mom visited with her dogs. She'd left a little pill-jar on the kitchen counter. Had she forgotten her medicine? It made a weird, soft sound when I shaked it. I opened the lid to shake some pills into my hand, only it wasn't pills. It was two fat ticks. FML

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By Ken - 10/5/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Swindon

The Talk

Today, I asked my 13-year-old son if he thought he was mature enough for a talk about "the birds and the bees." His response was, "They fly, so what? Why would I care?" FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend drove me home. I mentioned how I had recently started my period and he freaked out, saying I would "leak" through my tampon onto his seat. He made me sit on towels all the way home. FML

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By anxious spaghetti

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend over text. We wore each others' hats, so I gave his back and asked for mine. He “accidentally” burned it. FML

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By anonymus - United States

Today, I asked a woman where her beautiful accent was from. The woman stared at me for a while. Then her daughter told me that the reason her mother talked like that was because she had a stroke a few months ago. FML

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By SnuggieOverload - United States

Today, I finally found out that someone had stolen my debit card and maxed it out. The good news? Whoever it was forgot to change the address on the card, so everything they bought online has been shipped to me. The bad news? I've received 16 snuggies so far, and I'm still counting. FML

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By ArtistBlock

Today, I was in charge of Thanksgiving dinner. I dressed and stuffed the turkey, popped it in the oven and sent a mass text out to my family about how amazing it would be. Everyone arrived, we began making plates of food when I checked the turkey, and realized I never even turned on the oven. FML

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By poormanslucyliu1

Today, I had to teach my 13-year-old sister that sugar and salt don't, "cancel each other out to make the taste neutral". FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I started petting my cousin's Doberman. Now, whenever I stop he growls menacingly. FML

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By auntoftheyear - United States

Today, I saw my brother's pregnant girlfriend smoking. Disgusted, I asked him why he didn't just stab her in the uterus and get it over with. He laughed like it was a joke, then cussed because he spilled his cereal. He's more concerned about spilled cereal than having a brain-damaged child. FML

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By comfylap - United States

Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a cute girl I didn't know. She fell asleep on my lap by accident and I just let her for the whole train ride. This is the closest I've ever been with a woman. FML

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By Jennifer Sara Harms

Today, I made a 6-hour trip just to go to the wrong art festival. I have to go back and make the same trip again tomorrow. FML

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By Stressed Mother - United States - Piscataway

Today, after months of job hunting, I finally got a phone call. They were impressed with me. That's when my son decided to throw a tantrum asking for food. After some silence, the caller told me they were looking for someone who wasn't juggling little kids at home and hung up. My son is 20. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Columbia City

Heated gaming moment

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house after working a night shift. The door was locked and, so I wouldn't wake his parents, I called him. Twelve times. Each call went to voicemail and I was left standing outside in the freezing rain until he finally let me in. What was he doing? Playing video games. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched The Omen with my father. Halfway through driving me back home, he stopped the car and made me get out right there in a rough part of town. Fifteen minutes later, he drove up beside me, laughed hysterically at how terrified I was, and told me to get in. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Gainesville

Today, I'm so sick, I'm even sick in my dreams. Orientation for my new job starts tomorrow. FML

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By noiguessitsbroken :( - Lithuania - Kaunas

Today, I asked my mum why she never had any children after me. She scoffed and asked if I've looked in a mirror lately. FML

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By paulwatson93 - United States

Today, I went bowling with some friends. After a few beers I was showing off spinning the ball around on the tip of my finger. One trip to the ER and two crushed nuts later, I've found that mixing alcohol and heavy shiny balls is not a good idea. FML

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By AquaKelly - United States - Newark

Today, I set a trap to catch a mouse that ran across my foot. Not only did the trap shut on my finger twice, but I watched the mouse run over the trap without it snapping shut. I guess I have a new roommate. FML

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By My mom - France

Today, my mom walked me to school to make sure I don't cut class. I'm 20 years old. FML

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By fmlifer - United States

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML

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By candy man - United States - Chapel Hill

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

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By Khrixas_069 - United States

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

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By Aunjy - United States - Marmora

Today, I babysat a 4-year-old child for my neighbor. It seems he had diarrhea. The evidence of this is in his pants, down his leg, on the couch, on the bathroom floor, smeared on my wall, and in the shape of a brown handprint on my shirt. FML

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By Alan - Germany

Today, I agreed to stay a week with my wife's parents, who she told me were traditional Japanese. I was prepared for having to wear Japanese clothes while in the house, but I wasn't prepared for communal bathing in the same huge bath with her father, grandfather, uncle and two brothers. FML

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By L_M_AND_R_L - United States

Today, I asked my mom not to bring her dog to my wedding, since he's a real pain in the ass. She told me not to worry about it because she didn't feel like going anyway. FML

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By Pill popping zit monster

Today, my period has given to me 4 giant zits, 3 screaming shits, 2 stomach ulcers, and a fever blister on my lips. A few days until Christmas and the gifts keep coming. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, while sitting on the toilet, I noticed there was no toilet paper left, so I dug through my purse to use my one and only pad as a substitute. It clogged the toilet, and I started my period ten minutes later. FML

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By zero_minded12 - United States

Today, I was at the mall blasting music. I was wearing a nice shirt, and had my iPod in my breast pocket. I noticed a cute girl smiling at me, so I smiled back and as she started to walk over, I turned down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML

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By alissa_roar - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years told me I was being too obsessive. This is the guy who has gone through my phone two separate times and deleted all of my male contacts. FML

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By lala7 - United States

Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/9/2020 23:03 - Canada

Fucking Facebook memories

Today, Facebook showed me pictures from five years of a happy time I had traveling with a boyfriend, who later ended our 8-year relationship by telling me he had gotten an apartment and furniture in secret, and was moving out. No warning, no reason, no explanation. He never spoke to me again. I loved him. FML

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By dominator152 - United States

Today, my dad decided that my diploma makes a good pen-tester. FML

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By cap - United States - Manhattan

Last trip

Today, I had sex with my wife only to be told that the sex was horrible and to be given divorce papers. FML

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By Anonymous

Today, I got fired from my first-ever job. Via text. I hadn't even started the first day but I'm expected to drive an hour and a half to my now ex-boss's house to return the key. FML

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By Not A Pervert - United Kingdom - Peterborough

Today, while at work, I was shown CCTV footage of myself staring at the chest belonging to a teenager I was serving. I was accused of being a paedophile and nearly fired, all because I wanted to know what version of Spider-Man was on her T-shirt. FML

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By great - United States

Snarky

Today, I sat in my boss's office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

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By maxthndr - United States

Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML

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By BejeweledJizz

Today, after weeks of being addicted to Bejeweled Blitz, I couldn't stop thinking about it while having sex with my girlfriend. FML

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By Anon - United States - Paso Robles

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML

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Top comments

By OysterPearls | 33

#6297279 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:35

Pretty and mysterious? You're a real catch OP!

By brendejafulable | 41

#6297280 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:35

I bet he thought it was cute.

COMMENTS

By OysterPearls | 33

#6297279 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:35

Pretty and mysterious? You're a real catch OP!

By brendejafulable | 41

#6297280 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:35

I bet he thought it was cute.

lil_ham1644 | 29

#6297339 - Thursday 21 May 2015 17:06

I have heard that cute points are worth more than sexy points.

By A07 | 48

#6297281 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:37

Am I the only one who finds this to be cute and not a bad thing?

fakedsincerity | 32

#6297297 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:55

Sounded pretty adorable to me.

SweetasCandy0609 | 28

#6297324 - Thursday 21 May 2015 16:45

no #3 I think it is very cute, and since I doubt OP gave the guy a chance to get her number hopefully she runs into him again and he thinks that it was cute and he asks her, you should give us a follow-up OP.

trex454 | 21

#6297442 - Thursday 21 May 2015 19:14

nothing cuter then a girl with low self-esteem...

jtfrisch | 22

#6297466 - Thursday 21 May 2015 19:54

#34...lmao

SweetasCandy0609 | 28

#6297473 - Thursday 21 May 2015 19:59

seriously #34 we don't see it as her having low self esteem we see it as her being shy and innocent which their is nothing wrong with.

WolfAvenge | 22

#6297515 - Thursday 21 May 2015 20:59

I actually do have his number! We go to film school together but haven't hung out much. We were at a shoot for a fashion show. I totally plan on talking with him more, maybe asking to go out on a date soon too ;)

Since I joined the film club we will be seeing a lot of each other from now on anyway. I just want to hang out with him more first though, but I'm definitely interested if he still is XD

James_is_Mexican | 25

#6297538 - Thursday 21 May 2015 21:36

Congrats op! Have fun :)

austinpk | 14

#6297574 - Thursday 21 May 2015 23:31

You're eyes are very pretty

Drakone | 9

#6297702 - Friday 22 May 2015 3:01

#GiGGleSnort

Shmatterhorn | 38

#6297855 - Friday 22 May 2015 7:22

Good luck! I bet he'll understand, and you will have a good story to tell in the future.

MeowMcMeowenson | 19

#6300908 - Monday 25 May 2015 11:19

I don't know why no guy has ever called you pretty you are a very attractive woman not to be flirty

By iwanttogotoparis | 26

#6297283 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:38

Good first impression

Hoopachi | 19

#6297536 - Thursday 21 May 2015 21:32

Who said it was the first time they met? He may have just worked up some courage and told her his feelings.

By chronicB | 19

#6297284 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:39

Yeah a girl did that to me once and it just made me want her more ;-)

By rockwrench | 18

#6297286 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:41

And whats wrong with that? Sounds like the start of something good.

By Gaernem | 17

#6297287 - Thursday 21 May 2015 15:42

Don't worry OP, a lot of gentlemen will find that cute and not think much of it. Plus giggle-snort hide and seek is like a little bonus round for compliments.