Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I almost got run over on my bike by a truck who raced through a red light. After narrowly avoiding a collision, the car slowed down. Instead of apologizing for almost killing me, the driver stuck his head out of the window and yelled, "Nice ass!" FML
Today, I was driving in my very own car that I bought and paid for myself, when I stopped at a stop light. Then I noticed the truck in front of me turn on his reverse lights. I honked desperately. He hits me, looks out the window and says, "I see no damage" and drives away. FML
Today, I noticed there was a red truck following me. I walked as fast as I could. I then ran. It followed. I slipped on some ice and fell. I was unable to get up. It stopped beside me and the driver got out. I then said hello to my husband's new car. FML
Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML
Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML
Today, I saw a bad car wreck. I pulled over and ran to the car to find an unconscious man behind the wheel. Another car pulled up, and a guy got out. I was relieved to have help, until, to my horror, he started trying to hit on me. I was stuck with him until the ambulance arrived. FML
Today, while on the highway, a guy in a truck sped up to pass me. He was hauling a trailer, which hit me and ran me off the road. I called the cops and followed him all the way into town, where the cops pulled him over. They let him go without even a ticket, because, "He didn't know he hit you." FML
Today, my bike abruptly stopped working, torpedoing me headfirst into the sidewalk. I lay there in agony for a few minutes, and the only guy who saw it happen said, "Lucky you didn't get hurt!" FML
Today, on my way home, a truck driver was speeding next to me and as he passed I saw his truck was the kind that takes livestock to be butchered. I was thinking that I didn’t look to see if there were animals in there. Suddenly, brown items hit my windshield. Yes, it didn’t "hit the fan," it hit my car. FML
Today, I got rear ended. The guy flashed his lights at me to pull over, so I pulled into the side of the road. He drove away. FML
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Top comments
Ctrl_H 18
You got hit by a truck and the first thing you did was try to flirt?
frip_fml 9
You must look like you've been hit by a truck.
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Comments (119)
buddy51 23
Very smooth, OP, very very smooth! Still a better love story than Twilight!!
tpm45 25
You just got hit by a truck, and tried to bust a move on a man you don't know? YDI OP.... Should have just exchanged information like a polite and normal person.
Ziggy122 15
So, you get hit by a truck, and your first instinct is to flirt with the guy who hit you. Somebody's got their priorities in order...
kemnet 7
He should hit u again...you'd be even better
meherm 11
So you're first reaction was to wink at him...
Zebediabolical 45
I've done something like this. I was in a fender bender in a parking lot (my fault) and when I hopped out with insurance information in hand. I turned on my megawatt smile at the girl and said 'You'd be amazed what a guy'll do to get a cute girl's number.' She smiled back so I thought the tensions were defused. Next thing I know I'm getting bear mace in the face and she raced off. On the plus side, she didn't take down my info so she couldn't make me pay for her busted fender. On the minus side, I got a face full of bear mace. To make it worse she wasn't even that cute.
ninjalovin 8
Don't worry OP keep on trucking.
booboohoney 12
Rom-com gone wrong. Very, very wrong.
BlackBlazeCobra 16
FYL for being hit, but YDI for scaring him off. You could have smiled instead of winked, since winking could have meant something entirely different to him.
Ginger_Kat 2
Why the **** would you wink ?!?