Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friends took my phone and changed all the contact's names to characters from Harry Potter. I have over a hundred contacts and no idea who I'm talking to. I've been texting Draco Malfoy for 4 hours now. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, I found out my wife named our son after her ex-lover. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, I found out that my wife named our son after her ex boyfriend. FML
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
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Top comments
stupidpplsuck 33
That's probably because you go through your daughters phone. No sympathy from me Voldy.
neeni88 23
Could it simply be because you lack a nose and not due to your "evil" ways as a Mom? If it's any consolation, if your kids hate you, you must be doing something right!
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Comments (209)
RockNRollAndrew 18
Well you deserved it for going through your daughters business on her phone
Hollymae130 0
Gee I wonder why, mother of the year? Going through her phone seems perfectly normal
Nederlander95 14
Maybe it's because you do things like snoop through her phone
scice03 8
Quit looking through her shit and maybe she won't feel that way about you.
Nederlander95 14
I put fyl, but then I realized you were snooping through your daughter's phone. Maybe it's stuff like that that makes her not like you
MkayET 2
As much as this completely sucks........::I'm sorry but I'm rofling right now. XD But hey, it's probably just teenage angst. ^.^ she'll get over it. ^.^
wigginz 8
Well Voldemort is from Star Wars, not Harry Potter, so they must not all be Harry Potter names if you were Voldemort. If there wasn't a Weasley or Neville or Sirius Black or either of the Carrows or any other thing like that, they're just star wars
Shamandalie89 32
Wtf are you talking about?
fantasyworld 39
Why were you invading her privacy?
noamoa9 20
why would you go though her phone?
cats54321 19
YDI for snooping