Miscellaneous: Today, I picked up a warm blanket that just came out of the dryer....

By Anonymous - 23/02/2012 18:01 - United States

Today, I picked up a warm blanket that just came out of the dryer. Despite wearing pants, the static electricity from the blanket delivered a shock straight to my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 202

You deserved it 4 236

May weddings: Love and blunders
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/02/2013 07:32 - Canada - Campbell River

Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 271

You deserved it 7 872

Out of shape

By Out of shape - 21/03/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I got extremely winded from adjusting my blanket. What a workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 347

By Anonymous - 14/04/2016 05:13 - United States

Today, after a long day, I energetically took off my belt to take my pants off and relax. In doing so, I whipped the belt around in the air, causing it to spin around and slap me right in my tender ballsack. I almost threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 833

You deserved it 5 806

Creepy

By Anonymous - 22/02/2021 01:08 - United States - Irving

Today, the power went out so my family all stayed together in a one room to keep warm. I was on the bed against the wall and reached my hand down, only to find my panties tucked in the side of my brother's bed. Not one pair, but two. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 306

You deserved it 90

That's the power of love

By Sorry kitty - 15/10/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, I tried to pet my cat. By doing so, I accidentally shocked her with the static electricity in my fingers, and she slashed my face in retaliation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 157

By Whoops... - 02/09/2018 14:30

Today, my breakfast disagreed with me and I shit myself unexpectedly at the laundromat, right after starting the washer with all of my other pants in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 774

You deserved it 304

Bugging out

By Anonymous - 23/06/2013 04:10 - United States - Seattle

Today, while working the graveyard shift at my hotel, it felt a little chilly, so I grabbed a blanket out of the box we usually store old blankets in. Twenty minutes later, the live-in maintenance man casually remarked that those blankets are all infected with bed-bugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 056

You deserved it 7 262

By person - 26/12/2010 17:59 - Jordan

Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 913

You deserved it 28 330

By madeline9322 - 20/12/2016 03:15 - Canada

Today, the lack of heating in my room has gotten to the point where I have to cuddle my clothes for the next day at night so they're not freezing when I wake up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 571

You deserved it 784

The sweet smell of…

By Anonymous - 04/03/2017 14:00

Today, my not-quite-potty-trained toddler niece had a 'wee accident' in my bed. I used towels to mop it up and changed the sheets. Later, I had the bright idea to dry it faster by turning the electric blanket on high. Now my room smells like burned urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 947

You deserved it 6 550

DocBastard 38

Thursday 23 February 2012 23:24

Obviously the universe thought your sex life was dead, so it was trying a little CPR/defibrillation. "Shit, we lost him! Charge to 300! CLEAR!!" *ZAP*