Miscellaneous: Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door...

By shitless88 - 20/08/2011 00:23 - United States

Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 857

You deserved it 4 261

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Same thing different taste

By the_lameo_geek - 21/10/2013 02:16 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 044

You deserved it 4 041

By not a shitty situation so fuck you - 24/06/2016 22:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in a public toilet, I got to experience a guy high out of his mind kicking in my locked stall door and puking all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 842

You deserved it 771

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 05:50 - United States - Austin

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 799

You deserved it 3 901

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 046

You deserved it 3 547

By random - 29/04/2013 21:11 - Canada

Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 205

You deserved it 64 756

By Anonymous - 18/06/2019 06:44

Today, I was in a public toilet taking a dump. I then noticed someone trying to peep under the door, so I kicked them in the head as hard as I could. Turned out it was a 5-year-old looking for his parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 964

You deserved it 1 434

Spooky

By Scaredwitless - 28/01/2011 04:35 - United States

Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 901

You deserved it 6 012

Chub rub

By Anonymous - 19/03/2021 13:59 - United States - Malvern

Today, I was pooping in a public toilet and a kid had walked in on me. I then heard him tell his dad, "It's okay, I didn't see anything, he was fat so his chubby legs hid it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 891

You deserved it 187

Oh, hello there, don't mind me

By downinthedumps - 13/01/2015 02:47 - United States - Detroit

Today, I went to take a piss in a public bathroom. Somehow, I managed to completely jam the lock. After minutes of trying to get myself out, I gave up and crawled under the stall, at which point someone walked in and was very surprised to see me on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 989

You deserved it 3 337

Flow

By rapper in training - 11/02/2012 01:02 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the wall and threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 798

You deserved it 3 106

satanic_fml 13

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:31

the ****??

skinthesnakes 6

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:33

should have been like i plead the 5th and sat there silent as he listens to your shit sounds.

Comments

bosswinner 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:52

Lolololololol life would suck at that point of time I don't c y u just didnt report his ass

ugottaluvme 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:55

Make sure to right down your experience on the wall of the stall for all to read.

HowBoutYouShutUp 7

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:56

That's one way to get it allll out I guesss..

20jetsgo 3

Saturday 20 August 2011 7:30

Braids... Hahahaha

HowBoutYouShutUp 7

Saturday 20 August 2011 8:36

Twists* Exactly what point are you trying to get at..?

20jetsgo 3

Saturday 20 August 2011 9:01

Take em out..lol haha

HowBoutYouShutUp 7

Saturday 20 August 2011 9:04

How about no? :) I respect the attempt though, sweetheart, I really do.;*

hyden121 2

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:57

I would kick his a$$

20jetsgo 3

Saturday 20 August 2011 7:31

Oh your cool

BelleBelle_fml 11

Saturday 20 August 2011 9:22

My cool what?! I hate it when people leave me hanging like that...

trevishere 7

Saturday 20 August 2011 15:17

You're in a stall taking a dump with your pants around your ankles. So, you'd get up pants on the ground and beat him whilst ******** on him?

greenpurpleblack 2

Saturday 20 August 2011 5:57

Lemmiwinks is a hamster that was in mr.slaves ass and had to travel thru him to get out and survive. It's off south park.

zebradude 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 10:04

He was a GERBIL!!!!!!!

psycho456 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 6:00

Lemmiwinks? South Park reference

mchakkiwala 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 6:02

the fool paid for it himself. I wouldn't be around an excreting dude. Let alone watching him perform for a whole minute. or maybe that's just me.

mgsoloist 14

Saturday 20 August 2011 6:03

Haha I'm watching it on Netflix right now.

BitchesBeHatin 1

Saturday 20 August 2011 6:05

Hey atleast when you were scared shitless you were on a toilet : )

Buttsexpirate 9

Saturday 20 August 2011 6:07

Well hopefully you were angry enough to tear his balls off and replace the ones you shitted off.

rhysfucker 24

Saturday 20 August 2011 14:27

Mr Krabs??

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Same thing different taste

Spooky

Chub rub

Oh, hello there, don't mind me

Flow

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