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By fireass - 01/02/2017 21:24 - Australia - Gold Coast
Today, I looked at the container of lotion I have been using to treat my itchy, irritated and burning skin. Turns out it has peanut oil in it. Peanuts give me an itchy rash. No wonder it feels like I am sitting on a fire. Yep, I've been putting it on my asshole. FML.
Now you're one step up to be a dragon. Just get it on the other end of the hole and make flames shoot out.
You truthfully can claim you've got a hot ass.