By QueenOrangeSoda - 01/05/2013 21:33 - United States - Henderson

Today, I learned that binding my stomach with duct tape isn't worth it to look thin. I also learned the even worse part when I shrieked more loudly than I should've when I tried to discreetly rip it off in history class. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 574
You deserved it 62 819

QueenOrangeSoda tells us more.

QueenOrangeSoda 21

OP here! As one kid remarked, "That's a LOT of tape" and "But you're skinny!" If only he knew the whole thing. Yes, it was stupid, but when I took it off, I noticed that my fat was contained, and I looked thinner all day. Of course, no one deserves the pain of having it on or, even worse, removing it. (Those back hairs!) And let's not mention those blistering red marks. Still, it was worth the price. And no, I'm not fat or even chubby. I'm rather active--some would say hyper--and don't even eat that much in the first place. My weight and height are perfectly proportionate; I'm an average size. But since I'm not stick-skinny like my sisters, my family pesters me to lose weight. Besides, thinner girls at my school get more guys. I'd been sucking in for days, but I needed something to keep it that way. I sucked in when applying the duct tape, and since the fat couldn't get through its tight told, it looked as if my stomach were perfectly thin and flat. Sadly, some kids noticed and wondered why the heck my tummy was taped. I decided it wasn't worth the pain and I peeled it all off, awful pain and red marks included. I wish I could've cut it off; it would've been easier that way. After about halfway I excused myself to the bathroom to strip off the rest (the more painful parts) in a stall's confinement.

Top comments

That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Why would you use duct tape of all things if you wanted to bind your stomach? Sure it should've occurred to you to use Saran Wrap or something. Or just not bind it in the first place.

Why not actually work out to lose weight instead of doing something stupid


That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Why would you use duct tape of all things if you wanted to bind your stomach? Sure it should've occurred to you to use Saran Wrap or something. Or just not bind it in the first place.

Learn to love yourself! If you're not happy about something then fix it...just not with duct tape.

kryxen 14

Actually #11, if you trying to fix how hairy you are duct would work.

18 that is absolutely true. I use it to keep my balls lookin smooth.

chlorinegreen 27

I don't think duct tape is strong enough to pull out short course hair. It would if you stuck it to your longer head hair. I can just imagine the sticky residue left from duct tape all over somebody's body lol.

If you can't fix it with sticky tape, it ain't fixable. (Guido Hatzis anyone?)

One could just excercise though, healthier and much better looking on the long run. I'll cheer for OP.

There's only one word needed to describe this.... DUMBASS.

why bother using stuff like cling film or duct tape at all? they're called Spanx! not only are they non sticky, they're actually designed to do the very job OP was trying to do!

This brings pain to my abdomen just reading it.

Damn you 24 you just made soda come out of my nose

if you can't fix it with duct tape, you aren't using enough duct tape

strawberrywine22 30

But...but duct tape fixes EVERYTHING!!

Why not actually work out to lose weight instead of doing something stupid

Maybe OP has an illness that causes weight problems? Losing weight is not easy, and though I do not know OP's situation, I still do not suggest jumping to conclusions. And about the duct tape, maybe they were being bullied about their weight and OP simply did not know what to do?

Buying Spanx is another option. It's a bit expensive, but it makes more sense than freakin' duct tape.

20, aren't you a sweetie. Personally I do have a disease that makes me eat Krispy Kremes. To be fair you don't see any fatties in those African charity pics. (maybe KKs are in short supply.)

31, why would you see heavy people in African charity adverts for hunger..?

the point, my dear poopsi, is that they aren't fat because they DON'T EAT. Try it. [This nugget of wisdom was sponsored by Mr T Enterprises.]

So you are encouraging starving yourself, with or without an illness? That doesn't help weight, nor your health. I know many anorexic people, that is not the right way to do things. However I do enjoy the fact you just called me your "dear poopsie". C:

The number of health condition caused obesity is a rather low percentage of over all obesity. Unless you consider a crappy diet and lack of exercise health conditions. Losing weight isn't that hard. I pretty much halved myself in 2 years; and I actually have some of those health conditions allegedly keeping people from losing weight.. So stop making excuses.

Just because it was not too terribly hard for you does not mean it isn't for others. Congratulations on losing the weight, though!

caysters 12

Exactly! Plus out of those health conditions, most cause you to be overweight, NOT obese. I have thyroid issues and have always ALWAYS been overweight, but when I got to the "obese" category, it was not at all my thyroids fault. To lose weight, I have to work more than twice as hard as the average person, but I'm motivated enough to do it. I don't make excuses for my weight, "health issues" or not. Especially since a lot of those issues that cause weight gain had treatments, meaning the weight gain shouldn't be blamed on the issue.

Dear Poopsie, What a weird dream I had last night. Dreamt that a talking pile of shit commented on FML suggesting that since the hungry African children are skinny cause they don't eat, we should try starvation to lose weight. Thankfully its comments got buried and then I woke up. Love, Corpral Klinger

I'm sorry poopsi, I'm not entirely onside with "everybody is how they are" OP may either have a case of gaining some weight and is trying to hide it; or, over winter OP gained weight gradually and tried to fit into what she wore last summer. I believe the strongest case for losing weight is actually going out and exercising. how did biggest loser slim down most of their bigger competitors? If big people are MEANT to be that big, please explain the genetic advantage that would give us?

I really don't think OP should be focusing on losing weight right now, since it seems to be about looks/looking thin rather than actually being healthy. It seems right now that OP has confidence issues that should be looked at by a professional, or at least talked about with by a trusted adult.

@101: If you are using the Biggest Loser show as an example, I'd just like to point out that some people who won on the Biggest Loser are now back at their original weight.

Dear Poopsi, I hope you can help, I've got an angry band of fatties after me. Thankfully they can't run very fast but I'm pretty scared. How can I tell them : "sorry, I'm sure you're like that naturally, and I don't even SEE that bag of pretzels in your hand" ? (PS ever thought of an agony aunt column? Asking a pile of sh*t for advice on your own sh*t seems pretty good.)

109: So *some* of the contestants put the weight back on? There are likely tons of reasons this could have happened. The strongest point I'd like to make is that it is evident from the show that their weight had been lost due to exercise.

rabidpeach 5

i'd like to add that from persinal experience those who abstain from food are thinner than those who dont. blame your thyroid all you want but physics has something called "conservation of mass" whereby if you dont e@t all the food, you dont put on all the weight.

7yzzFML 17

I'm really sick of people people pulling out that crap excuse. In studies and surveys done it showed that less than 1% of obese people had a medical condition causing it. So dont use that stupid excuse, its not relevant at all. As for how hard it is to lose weight, burning more energy than you consume is NOT HARD. I saw some huge fat woman today in a food court, grazing away at McDonalds. Pathetic. I have sympathy for people who are battling unfortunate genetics that give them a slower metabolism. But if you're eating crap like that, you deserve every taunt you get.

Why would you ever think duct tape of all things was a good idea?

3- agreed especially since we now have Spanx. They'll take inches off your waistline until you get yourself in shape.

Spanx are my best friend on a night out. they make me look awesome. until i try to pull them down to do a wee

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
ltaper11 20

Maybe next time try to put stick side on outside and make it tight. Then layer over with another to solve the problem of stickiness, or buy a corset. Good luck breathing buddy

chlorinegreen 27

Or eat better and become more active?

^OP's got bronchitis! Ain't nobody got time fo dat!

I like the corset idea. I've got a nice one I can sell you, OP. :)

People should t care about how you look. It's your mind that matters. However, I'm a little worried about that too.

7yzzFML 17

If someone is the size of a cow then I'm afraid that philsophy kind of goes out the window, because know matter how many times you say that, people will stare in shock and ridicule behind backs

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
upallnight11 19

He is just an ifunny user trying to get the same top comment as on one of the pictures on the app. Dumb.

YawMoney 14

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
flockz 19

OR instead of being the queen of orange soda, you could, you know, eat a salad once in awhile.

It kinda sounds like OP has confidence issues, or possibly some kind of weight-related mental disorder(Not saying they definitely do, but it kinda sounds like it), and they might be trying to lose weight as fast as possible, even if it means not really losing weight and just covering it up. It kinda sounds like OP might need to talk to someone and try to figure out ways to be more confident before they should try losing weight for reasons that don't sound like they are about health. And, they could possibly have some kind of health issue that makes them have trouble losing weight or their metabolism could be strange or maybe they don't actually drink orange pop all the time and they just like it anyways so they made their username for fun?? Anyways thought, I'm kinda upset honestly that more people are worried about OP finding proper ways to hide their stomach or lose weight rather than trying to help OP be more accepting of themselves and have confidence.

xxEternalRain 13

Salads doesnt give you nutrients nor is it fattening. So thats just bad advice

CaroAurelia 12

OR, instead of being a dick, you can try being nice every once in a while.

Mr25_fml 14

Or, you know, you could've went to the restroom and cut the tape with scissors

Yeah, why take it off in the middle of history class?

CharresBarkrey 15

I agree with the restroom part, but scissors would be useless. Even if you cut it, it's all stuck to your skin.

WrongRomance 11

Yeah, history class though? If people see you taking it off doesn't it defeat the purpose of using it to appear thin?

QueenOrangeSoda 21

I eventually did excuse myself to the restroom halfway through, where I could strip off the rest (the more painful parts) within the stall's confinement.

I really don't see why this FML was posted. Based on the photo, you don't even look fat. If anything you look pretty so yea...