Today, I got my period, and had to rush to my parents' bathroom for some pads. They'd put all our wrapped presents in their bathroom. As I was looking, my dad thought I was opening presents and barged in, only to see me with my pants around my ankles. Now he won't stop laughing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad came home and wanted to grab a glass. It wasn't in direct sight so he slammed the cupboard door so hard, I peed my pants. FML
Today, my mom told my dad to get me extra absorbent pads, very loudly, in a crowded mall. FML
Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML
Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML
Today, I woke up at night to go to the toilet. My Dad was doing his thing with the toilet door wide open. I saw, screamed at the top of my lungs and peed my pants in horror. Now my throat hurts and I'm too embarrassed to look at him. FML
Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML
Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML
Today, while shopping with my father, I had to use the restroom. As soon as I opened the door to the men's room, my father yelled that it was the ladies' room. I then turned around and went through the other door, where I ended up getting bitch-slapped. FML
Today, I grabbed a pair of pants from the dryer in a hurry, trying to make it to the bank. When I rushed in, I felt something fall down my leg. It was a pair of my mom's granny panties that had been stuck inside my jeans. I kicked them aside, hoping no one would notice. They did. FML
Today, I'm on the last few days of my period. After nothing came out the whole day, a dollop of blood suddenly poured out, somehow managed to entirely circumvent the giant pad I was wearing, and went straight into my underwear, pants, and the chair I was sitting on. FML
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Top comments
Fuaaad1994 31
He won't be laughing when he sees blood all over the floor
DocBastard 40
I've heard some good excuses for snooping around the house looking for Christmas presents, but this one is by far the best. I like how you had your pants down just to complete the ruse. Very clever, ma'am. Very clever.
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Comments (90)
joea21 21
Just go with Christmas gets you very "excited"
JoJo91_fml 8
it usually ends bad when people barge in to occupied bathrooms LOL
jdwmoore 5
red. Christmas color so its ok
itzjstnx 18
why were there presents in the bathroom in the first place? O.o
israelnotjacob 20
If your parents picked the bathroom to hide presents, then I'm going to say they were some shitty gifts.
Guy_Named_Dav 14
There's this funny little invention called a lock
Nordrag 26
If I see another one of these I'll shove your philosophical quotes so far up your ass you wont shit for months.
Uhhhidk 3
Like he's never seen a bloody cooch before.
hunts19ketchup 23
So that is supposed mean he would be ok with seeing his daughter's...?
brandoneyez1 25
Did u write dad in blood on his gift... Lol
nicky_8017 3
That's cruel of him