Today, I found out that my boyfriend's mom doesn't believe you can get food poisoning from food that is cooked. She gave us food that had sat out all day/night and then got angry when I said we could get sick. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my boyfriend is pissed at me for giving everyone food poisoning right before the holiday and ruining the weekend. He’s the one that forced and berated me into using the nasty expired ingredients in his mom’s kitchen, even though I knew better. FML
Today, my girlfriend screamed at me for throwing away her food, calling me a sick, controlling psycho. When I pointed out that the seafood pasta I tossed was a week old and almost certainly rotten, she dug the box out of the trash and ate it to prove a point. Now she's got food poisoning and somehow it's my fault. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a restaurant we both like. By the end of the date, we were fighting and she angrily broke up with me. To make things worse, I got food poisoning. She didn't. FML
Today, I got food poisoning for the first time after cooking. Yesterday, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
Today, my mother decided to inform me that she doesn't believe canned food can have an expiry date and that the food is still okay to eat years after the 'supposed' expiry date. She's probably been cooking my dinner with expired food for over 17 years. FML
Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because, "It's chicken, not salmon." FML
Today, my boyfriend's mom is talking shit about me to anyone who will listen, all because I refused to stay at her house and help her with a few chores she said she would pay me for. She keeps leaving out the part where I saw dozens of bed bugs not even 5 minutes after I got there. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend out to dinner to an expensive restaurant. He overate, and now I have to nurse him through food poisoning. FML
Today, my parents brought home lunch from a shady grocery store deli. They mused about how hard I am to feed because I turned it down; the last time I ate anything from there, it gave me botulism, and it tastes horrible anyway. They both got sick. Now I'm playing nurse to both. No apologies yet. FML
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Top comments
Chadica 17
Did she eat it though?
Magnoxidans 19
Cook some food, leave it out for a week, show her the mold growth. If she doesn't believe you after that, let natural selection take its course...
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Comments (22)
thatoneguy500 8
Judging by the ambiguity of with details I'm guessing you are exaggerating a lot
crudeandrudeguy 29
How dare you be smarter than her. The nerve of young people these days...
WeirdUS 30
I feel your pain I knew someone's mother who didn't know about cross-contamination between raw meat and cook meat. Thankfully I never got sick eating there. Better safe than sorry specially if there is meat in it.
murph_fml 21
Sure as shit you can. Here's a good experiment: Cook a pan of corner beef hash and leave it on the stove all night, then cook it again & serve in the morning. Like a bullet to the head.
moondoglou420 17
I had to deal with this to some extent in my own family. I just tell them, look, I have no problem with you preparing food the way that you like it, but me personally, I will only eat food that is prepared according to the FDA guidelines the same way it is handled in any public restaurant. If you want to cook it that way that is ok, but please let me know so I can eat ahead of time or prepare my own food.
jazam1 3
Classic sign of a control freak that will not change. Stand your ground and get your BF to defend you.
JHB2010 5
But did you die tho?