Today, I fell in love with a girl who used to love me. She doesn't... - FML

By Faxshadow - 7/1/2009 17:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I fell in love with a girl who used to love me. She doesn't anymore. FML

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Family values

Ambien conversations are the worst

Healthy relationship

By Anonymous - 30/9/2009 22:57 - United States

Today, I was looking at my wedding photos. The photographer moved onto the "candid" shots and thought it would be cute to have pics of us making out at the reception. I have blonde hair. The girl in the picture did not. FML

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By Anonymous - 20/5/2009 15:11 - United States

Today, I went to my girlfriend's Catholic all girls high school to ask her to prom by decorating her car. As soon as I walked on campus the school went into lock down because of a "suspicious male intruder." When I saw my girlfriend, she denied knowing me. I was arrested. FML

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By Sloppy Cashmere - 9/5/2016 21:26 - United States - Bemidji

Today, I visited a waterpark with friends. At one point, a woman floating near me suddenly says to me, "How are you doing, honey?" Instinctively, I replied, "I'm well". The woman gave me a strange look and I turned around to find she was talking to her child directly behind me. FML

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By Anonymous - 14/3/2010 07:54 - United States

Dirty talk

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML

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By wdones97 - 8/10/2018 14:00

Today, at my job, I was so tired and aggravated that I accidentally mumbled, "I need a drink." One of the patients I was taking care of heard me and said, "Me too." I work at an addiction rehab facility. FML

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By taylortotscx - 27/5/2012 17:15 - United States - Ocala

Today, I went to Busch Gardens. Trying to cool off, I got on a ride that soaked me to the bone. For the rest of the time I was there, my bra was visible through my clothes, along with the "Hell Yeah" printed on my underwear. FML

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By Anonymous - 25/5/2016 16:38 - United States - Astoria

Today, a stranger nearly beat the crap out of my boyfriend for being a pedo. I ended up showing the guy my driving license to prove I'm not a pre-teen and that I'm just freakishly young looking. FML

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By fun in functioning, I suppose - 20/1/2015 19:54 - United States - Starkville

Today, I texted my boyfriend a few dirty messages at lunch time and told him how badly I wanted him home. He texted back lecturing me on how I shouldn't be so drunk so early. I was totally sober, but now I need a drink. FML

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By sadinthesack - 31/8/2009 18:56 - United States

Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML

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By MB101 - 28/9/2012 00:19 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to sing at karaoke. I sang a romantic love ballad to him. He dedicated Rick James' "Super Freak" to me. FML

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By Mia - 26/1/2019 02:00

Today, I wanted to bake some chocolate chip cookies. As the first load was done, I tasted a cookie and it tasted too salty. Thinking it was because of the pinch of salt, I added more sugar to the batter, only to realize that the sugar I've put into the whole batter was actually salt. FML

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By tina247 - 24/1/2011 15:50

Today, I realised that my husband's vows were actually the love speech from 'When Harry Met Sally'. This was made even more humiliating when I discovered that he hadn't even come up with the idea himself, he had seen it in an episode of Scrubs. FML

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By Anonymous - 13/4/2012 10:32 - United States - Singapore

Today, I was bragging about how I had lost 10 pounds. Grinning, I pulled my shirt up and tried to show how big my jeans were on me. Instead, the button flew off my pants. FML

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By sn-511 - 1/3/2013 22:54 - Italy - Naples

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

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By abby181 - 3/9/2011 14:36 - United States

Today, my six year old nephew told me to peel off my skin because, "They say you look prettier on the inside." FML

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By Anonymous - 22/1/2016 19:31 - United States - Cloquet

Today, my shitburglar of an ex asked me to take him back. He said dumping me was a huge mistake. He dumped me because I was bed-ridden for several weeks and was in no condition to have sex. If his social media is anything to go by, he only wants me back because he couldn't get laid elsewhere. FML

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By - 16/1/2019 20:00

Today, I got trapped in the airport lift for half an hour with my family while heading to departure. We ended up missing our flight. 3000 Malaysian bucks were spent on that flight. No one wants to compensate our loss. FML

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By strawberrykiwi62 - 11/6/2009 09:09 - Israel

Today, I found out that my extremely-flat chested cousin recently got a boob job. When my mom found out, she said "Oh that's great! They look so good!". Then she looks at me and tells me that I should get one. Everyone including my own mother thinks I should get a boob job. FML

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By Anonymous - 3/10/2013 05:24 - Canada - Scarborough

Today, my grandmother convinced me to come to a church meeting with her. My grandmother then made funny faces at me while the pastor was speaking, causing me to laugh out loud. Everyone heard me, including the pastor. FML

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By Tooth Fairy - 25/5/2018 16:00 - United States - Hays

Today, I broke a tooth. It’s Friday. Not a single dentist office is open. The good news? I might lose those last few pounds as I can’t drink or eat without excruciating pain. Needless to say, it’s going to be a long weekend. FML

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By sliceddice - 10/3/2010 16:08 - Denmark

Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML

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By anonymous - 25/3/2015 04:24 - United States - Lubbock

Today, I was doing homework and I had my leg bent in a funny position. When I stood up, my hip dislocated. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. When people ask me what happened, I have to say I dislocated my hip doing calculus. FML

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By Anonymous - 3/7/2016 23:22

Today, after months of planning and saving for our honeymoon in Italy, my wife and I were turned away at the airport because my passport only has a month until it expires, even though it's only a five-day trip. FML

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By keenan - 19/9/2010 23:55 - United States

Today, I had to use my driver's license to convince the security guard at a game room that I was a girl. FML

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By Anonymous - 21/6/2013 14:28 - United States

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

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By 3Airwalk3 - 16/2/2010 05:23 - Canada

Today, I was washing a stainless steel pot at my kitchen job. Every time I pulled it out of the dishwasher and examined it for dirt, I saw something orange inside it. After 3 run-throughs, I realized it was just my shirt's reflection. FML

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By Bisounours - 22/7/2011 11:23 - France

Today, I went to see the new Harry Potter movie with my boyfriend. Feeling an intense need to pee, he decided to sacrifice a few minutes of the movie before the highly-anticipated final combat to get some relief. He went through the wrong door, locking himself out. Right until the end. FML

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By WTF - 12/10/2012 23:00 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML

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By Anonymous - 14/6/2016 02:39 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, on a first date, he told me I look like his ex's mom. FML

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By Anonymous - 11/3/2014 18:51

Today, I had to explain to my husband that it's biologically impossible for cats and dogs to cross-breed, and that his "brilliant idea" of getting ours to mate is just plain disturbing. He still doesn't believe me. FML

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By Anonymous - 25/12/2011 20:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I attended my extended family's Christmas dinner. All throughout, my grandmother kept complaining about how the food tasted like crap, and making sexual remarks such as how "the stuffings were far better in my day, if you know what I mean." FML

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By anon - 26/12/2013 12:08 - Australia

Today, I watched "Time of the Doctor" and I'm pretty sure my love of Doctor Who slithered out through my ear and shamefully lodged itself in the darkest corner of the room, crying. FML

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By Anonymous - 11/3/2010 22:44 - United States

Today, while at the dog park, I suddenly had to use the bathroom really badly. Since there weren't any facilities nearby, I decided to go behind a tree and relieve myself there. While doing this, two other owners, one that's in my math class, noticed me, regardless of me hiding. She definitely saw everything. School will be fun tomorrow. FML

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By amie - 11/8/2009 08:43 - Canada

Today, my mom said that we needed to have a family meeting because of all the issues that have been going on with our family. My mom, sister and I sat down and began to talk about everything. As I started to cry my sister looks at my mom and says "I win!". She bet my mom $20 that I would cry. FML

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By Brendan - 19/2/2011 21:23 - Canada

Today, while on lunch break, my fat, old co-worker walked into the break-room. I managed to block out his perverted heavy breathing, but had to leave when he began emitting a terrible odor that smelled like cheesy, sweaty molding feet. I barely held onto my lunch. FML

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By Anonymous - 26/6/2020 14:11

Free healthcare for all

Today, I had to attend an appointment and was told I should be prepared to be in hospital all day, so I booked a day off work. The appointment was trivial and lasted 10 minutes. I work paycheque to paycheque to feed myself and 2 kids, and even missing one day will hurt by the end of the month. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/9/2013 17:23 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, a girl who's in charge of a group project that I get graded on, asked if Bill Gates was a Founding Father. She was totally serious. I'm screwed. FML

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By oh, shit...... - 2/2/2016 20:27 - Denmark - Bagsv?rd

Today, I was at the gym. At the end of my workout, I realised I lost the bundle of keys I had in my pocket that contained the key to my locker with all my stuff. I panic and start looking for them. After an hour of desperate searching, I find them thrown in the bottom of the public toilet. Thanks. FML

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By Anonymous - 4/1/2012 06:43 - United States

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

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By lol - 25/1/2012 15:54 - Canada

Today, I was making breakfast. My microwave door was already open, but I couldn't figure that out so I kept pressing the button. According to Einstein, I'm now insane. FML

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Top comments

By cndrow | 0

#903 - Monday 9 February 2009 22:52

I can relate.. I ended up dumping my long time best friend/boyfriend/lover, only to find out 6 months later I loved him dearly. Fortunately I don't have an "FML" because he gave me one last chance- and we're happier than ever now.

Hope things work out. :(

By jacksonme | 0

#745 - Monday 9 February 2009 1:03

I fell back in love with my ex that I broke up with. It was only supposed to be a short breakup, so I could find myself, and at the time he loved me dearly - now I'm just some bitch.

COMMENTS

By jacksonme | 0

#745 - Monday 9 February 2009 1:03

I fell back in love with my ex that I broke up with. It was only supposed to be a short breakup, so I could find myself, and at the time he loved me dearly - now I'm just some bitch.

Reply

D4ni3l96 | 5

#975208 - Tuesday 6 April 2010 17:17

I can totally relate to your situation except... the other way round.

Reply

iLoveTeraaa | 0

#979952 - Thursday 15 April 2010 4:50



Reply

monkeybanana | 7

#2754922 - Saturday 25 June 2011 8:59

happened to me too haha. not exactly like that though but it still happened

Reply

Rainbowjumper0 | 12

#4961535 - Saturday 22 September 2012 23:04

*Insert Adele song here* That sucks for you and OP :(

Reply

Toasty283 | 8

#5547655 - Sunday 23 June 2013 4:56

Adele should make a song just for FML

By cndrow | 0

#903 - Monday 9 February 2009 22:52

I can relate.. I ended up dumping my long time best friend/boyfriend/lover, only to find out 6 months later I loved him dearly. Fortunately I don't have an "FML" because he gave me one last chance- and we're happier than ever now.

Hope things work out. :(

Reply

gars56 | 5

#4806516 - Monday 13 August 2012 4:34

I did the same thing except by the time I realized it she had moved on :(

By bbk_fml | 1

#5634 - Monday 23 February 2009 3:40

when i started my relationship i was pushin it, but i could tell he loved me. Now we broke up, im mad in love, he doesnt care anymore.

Reply

emmaa3451 | 11

#3516814 - Monday 31 October 2011 3:33

Omg yes, lol

By alleffedup | 0

#7645 - Thursday 26 February 2009 7:38

Like when I fell in love with a guy that loved me. He stopped loving me when I loved him.

By rainbox_fml | 0

#8253 - Friday 27 February 2009 2:40

agh....i'm a girl and i just did that to someone. i feel like a horrible person.

By drummwill | 0

#21418 - Sunday 8 March 2009 16:52

shit man, taht ahppens to me ALL THE TIME!
gawdddd

Reply

D4ni3l96 | 5

#975209 - Tuesday 6 April 2010 17:20

lmao ^^^

By Ramizzle | 0

#21995 - Sunday 8 March 2009 22:29

Amen to that, same excact thing happened to me 2 weeks ago and i'm still emo about it. the followiung chances i had to easy the situation, i effed up even more. FOL

By zzz_fml | 0

#22042 - Sunday 8 March 2009 22:55

I'm in this situation right now.. only he loves another girl. stupid me.

Reply

chocolatepr | 4

#4278276 - Monday 9 April 2012 2:07

that sucks

By User__Name | 0

#37838 - Tuesday 17 March 2009 19:53

aww.

By fallchild007 | 0

#41526 - Thursday 19 March 2009 1:22

I can relate. I used to like someone and we never told each other - 3 years later we found out we had liked each other. haha.