Kids: Today, I actually had to explain to my sister that Shrek was... - FML

By riiiighhhttttt - 05/08/2013 05:38 - United States - Laurel

Today, I actually had to explain to my sister that Shrek was not in fact based on a true story. She replied that I'm a "clueless twat". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 692

You deserved it 4 348

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Same thing different taste

Beyond help

By Anonymous - 03/04/2015 18:43 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I explained to my sister that the reason she isn't getting job offers is probably because her résumé is in Comic Sans and contains TXT language and a lot of typos. She thanked me for my help by calling me a "clueless horse-fucker" and telling me to shut my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 977

You deserved it 2 511

Too realistic

By ThatLove - 05/04/2023 18:00 - Switzerland - Worb

Today, I had to explain to my housemate that the cast of "The Crown" is not the real Royal Family impersonating themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 104

By Anonymous - 07/03/2015 19:05 - United States - Brandon

Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression, so I turned the TV on in a desperate attempt to drown him out. You'll never guess what movie was on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 723

You deserved it 4 653

Too awkward to function

By Anonymous - 27/06/2023 23:00 - United States - Stillwater

Today, my sister told me she doesn't think her mom died the way she was told. Uncomfortable, I declined to give my 2 cents on the matter, saying, "I'm sorry" and, "Oh sh!t, sorry." She started gaslighting me about how I wasn't listening, and I told her I was sorry for being a piece of shit, so she then gaslit me about that too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 242

You deserved it 672

They exist

By baffleduncle - 27/07/2019 20:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I listened to my niece explain to me, in great detail, that the Titanic never sank, and that the year it supposedly did was a prediction of 9/11. She learned all of this from some whackjob conspiracy theory videos, and acts like she's an expert now as a result. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 839

You deserved it 151

By Anonymous - 28/04/2013 03:16 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I had to explain to a friend that the show writers for Glee did not write "Bohemian Rhapsody" and that Freddie Mercury did not steal the song from them. We're both 17 years old, and she reacted by kicking a chair at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 217

You deserved it 3 444

By Anonymous - 14/01/2010 21:56 - United States

Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 350

You deserved it 3 821

By anon - 17/12/2015 18:45

Today, I had to explain to someone in my class who Gandhi really was and that he was not a fictional goblin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 632

You deserved it 1 642

By Brastro - 07/04/2009 11:46 - Ireland

Today, we were at the end of our surfing trip watching a photo montage. A picture popped up of an ugly girl surfing so I shouted out "I didn't know Shrek could surf". The room went very quiet. "Shrek" was sitting beside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 986

You deserved it 179 111

By sickdisney - 21/05/2012 18:42 - United States - Riverside

Today, I watched a movie with my little sister. I couldn't understand a word that was said during one scene, but I figured it was in some kind of made-up language. When I commented on it later, she called me a moron and said it was Spanish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 118

You deserved it 35 987

Next

Top comments

goingsolo211 8

Monday 5 August 2013 19:00

And now you're gonna tell me Santa isnt real too?

rg350dx 29

Monday 5 August 2013 19:22

You might want to consider dental hygiene if you're old enough to live alone and are still losing teeth.

Comments

RoboCunnilingus 23

Tuesday 6 August 2013 4:25

Twist, #11. Op's sister is five so she's ahead of the curve.

SariaCollins 5

Tuesday 6 August 2013 5:02

Haha shes more funny than me!

HeartOfLead 24

Tuesday 6 August 2013 5:59

Your sister's an ass for acting in such a manner.

codah_johnson 3

Tuesday 6 August 2013 12:29

Is she younger than 10

interesting33 36

Tuesday 6 August 2013 19:38

The character Shrek was based on a real man.

mistress99 5

Tuesday 6 August 2013 20:19

It actually is. There was a man who had a condition and it made him look like that. Except he didnt hav skin that was as green as shrek

damnit1989 16

Wednesday 7 August 2013 19:24

Shrek was based on a real person though....his name was Maurice Tillet, he was a pro wrestler in France, and had a disease called acromegaly.

aybaybay94 6

Thursday 8 August 2013 2:15

Unfortunately your sister is right. Shrek is based on the story of Maurice Tillet, a guy who was did formed due to a condition called acromegaly. So YDI for not looking into your facts before belittling her :)

Ynpfoi 1

Friday 9 August 2013 9:13

the character of shrek was based on a french wrestler or something with a deformity. actually. so, it kind of is. >>

operator47 10

Friday 9 August 2013 16:46

Don't you know anything? Go educate yourself fool.

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The Top

Today, I get to add spaghetti sauce to my rather extensive list of things that don't belong in a person's eye but that end up in mine anyway. Other items include molten cheese, rock salt, orange juice, chips of nail polish, cotton fibers, and firework ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 112

You deserved it 5 027

Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 458

You deserved it 2 907

The Top

Today, my friend and I went to a really expensive restaurant. We got really bad service, so halfway through the meal we decided to dine-and-dash. Turns out I left my purse in the restaurant. With my I.D. and everything inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 000

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Today, we've been saving for months. I thought we were saving for a down payment. Apparently, to my wife, "down payment" means "Amazon Prime Day savings fund." We had over thirty grand, now we've got less than five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 320

You deserved it 139

Today, my husband told me that the only reason he took up jogging 4 years ago was because my mother moved in next door to us and he knew it would kill my sex drive. We haven’t had sex in 4 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 002

You deserved it 712

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 994

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Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

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Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized build-a-bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear "we should break up" instead. FML

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You deserved it 61