Health: Today, for the first time in my 21 years on this earth I woke...

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By death. - 27/03/2016 23:50 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, for the first time in my 21 years on this earth I woke up with a cold. I also have my period and the hiccups. Every time I hiccup I cough every time I cough I can feel the blood being pushed out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3

You deserved it 1

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Awkward Love Students Relatable Work Racism Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Health Teenagers Friends Intimacy Sex Embarrassing Food Revenge Cats Boredom Animals Management Kids Parenting Sexism Parents Weird Miscellaneous Job interview Facebook Jealousy

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Today, I began noticing a certain female name popping up on my husband’s social media notifications,so I asked him about it. He got irrationally upset at the fact that I pronounced her name wrong, told me she’s “nobody”, then said, “I hate it when you accuse me of shit!” I didn’t even accuse him of anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 571

You deserved it 76

Today, I told my ultra-Catholic mother that I was hanging out with a girl. While walking out of the flat, I didn't realize that I'd dropped one of my condoms out of my pocket. My mother saw it and ripped it apart, then yelled at me that, "Sex is for having children! You're giving yourselves to Satan!" I'm 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 244

You deserved it 319

The Top

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 484

You deserved it 5 977

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 151

You deserved it 3 984

Today, I rescued a cactus from a lethal fall. It thanked me with a handful of spines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 406

You deserved it 32 979

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 623

You deserved it 43 685

Today, while trying to sleep, my roommates were shouting in the next room. When I poked my head out to tell them to shut up, I was greeted by the sight of one of them with his knob duct-taped inside a gun holster, and the other one trying to rip it off. And they wonder why I'm not more social. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 817

You deserved it 1 334

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 655

You deserved it 5 056