Today, I got stitches in my breast. I never knew how much they jiggled until every bump on the road made my breast feel like it was on fire. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while jogging, I realized my face jiggles more than my breasts. FML
Today, I was stabbed in the chest. Not with a knife though, the under-wire from my bra escaped and stabbed me in the boob. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's because I could feel something solid in my breasts, and I wanted to get it checked, just to be safe. Turns out it was my ribs. Oops. FML
Today, as I bent over to pick up my baby, a wasp flew into my bra. I jumped up in a panic, flattening the wasp between my boob and my bra, where it stung me on the nipple, which is now swollen, a funny colour, and throbbing. Did I mention the nipple was already irritated from breastfeeding? FML
Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML
Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML
Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML
Today, I was walking down the hallway when someone opened a door, smashing it into me. The bump makes it look like I have a third boob. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML
Today, after a 3-day induced delivery for my twins, and after getting stitches down there, I woke up to boobs that are the size of footballs, and still no milk coming out. The pain of chopping them off at this point would be more bearable. FML
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Top comments
noobienick 19
I guess they aren't your breast friends
lex1459 38
How did you end up needing those...? Sorry about the pain, OP :(
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Comments (64)
andilovehim 14
Ouch, I know that feeling! I've never had to get stitches from it but I usually wear 2 sports bras and hold them down when I go 4x4ing.
DogeMan 14
Almost 1000 she deserved it's??? That's mean she can't help it and it's sound painful... Come on guys be nice
bigmike25 11
Ouch, sorry OP that you had to go through pain :(
demonfacee 14
There's always sport bras and not running while your boobs are healing.
smc3106 25
She wasn't running, she was driving & the bumps on the road made her breasts bounce. Did you even read the whole FML?
jrauk 2
Breast implant?
ohishkabibble 21
Oh my god, I'm so sorry for your boob pain; that is the PITS! I wish you a speedy recovery!
jos_ad 3
Don't believe you. Need video proof
solispa90 2
I feel your pain. For me, it's the cheek. I can't walk without wincing.
ModernZelda 19
Sports bras should help, OP. Hope the pain subsides soon enough!
iwadasn 33
It sounds like you need a more supportive bra. Try a full-coverage one bra or a sports bra.