Sex ban

By Ash - 13/12/2020 07:02 - United Kingdom

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend got mad at me because I failed to notice I’ve been on a sex ban as punishment for upsetting her mother 3 weeks ago. Three weeks isn’t even our longest no sex period; we’ve gone months without sex before for no good reason, so is it any wonder I didn’t notice after only 3 weeks? FML
I agree, your life sucks 2 093
You deserved it 365
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Fugs Smith 3
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If she's using sex to control you, her behaviour is only going to get worse, (and it sounds like her mother is also going to be part of the problem.) You need to have a very serious talk, because this is not a good relationship to be in if you already don't care.

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QueenSaru 28
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Maybe she should grow up and use her words instead, what the heck... That is a bucket of red flags, OP. Sit down, have a mature chat, but I'd probably also start packing and be halfway out the door.

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kfchicken 31
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seems like a little bit of a red flag to me

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lev 11
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understatement of the month

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Fugs Smith 3
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If she's using sex to control you, her behaviour is only going to get worse, (and it sounds like her mother is also going to be part of the problem.) You need to have a very serious talk, because this is not a good relationship to be in if you already don't care.

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rebelwithmouseyhair 17
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If OP, in OP's words, "upset" his GF's mother, I don't see why the mother would be a problem. It sounds like OP's upsetting behaviour is the problem. It seems to me that the GF finds such behaviour to be a complete turn-off. Should she have sex with him even if she doesn't feel like it? I don't see that it's "controlling" to say no when you're not in the mood.

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Kent Griffin 3
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that would be a hell of a red flag to me and the woman would only do that to me one time

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OrySoma 11

using sex as a behaverioal control method for your partner is manipulative and wrong if shes turned off by him then she should break up with him not say oh your banned from this because you upset my mom thats stupid and immature and actions like that speak loudly about how she was raised and her mother is probrably another manipulative psycho they tend to anger easily when you don't do something they want and also tend to do shit like this op should run for the hills and you should stop sticking up for manipulative females toxic is toxic op feel free to correct me if im wrong

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Bogrbon 27
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It's controlling to be mad that he hasn't recognized that it's a deliberate "sex ban" and punishment. It's not that she's just not in the mood. It's that she's deliberately withholding affection as an attempt at punishment and then mad that he's not recognizing it. She's definitely more than a little passive aggressive and toxic. We can't promise that the OP isn't also toxic and at fault, but the girlfriend's behavior is also unreasonable.

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RichardPencil 30
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You should marry her. That usually fixes everything!

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Crowned Sataness 11
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yeah a woman that controls you with sex is no good. why the hell are you still there?

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Charlie Given 25
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Been there done that before it's only gonna get worse

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QueenSaru 28
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Maybe she should grow up and use her words instead, what the heck... That is a bucket of red flags, OP. Sit down, have a mature chat, but I'd probably also start packing and be halfway out the door.

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rebelwithmouseyhair 17
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Maybe those other times were because of your behaviour too, but you never realised.

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Bogrbon 27
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If that's the case, the girlfriend has the responsibility to address and communicate her feelings and not just shut OP out. As it stands, if this is a regular thing, it's a very toxic pattern to the relationship, on both sides.

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Brightside86 29
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I dont think your gf is gf material, considering getting out before this becomes the darkest timeline.

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treehead42 10
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If you go months without sex without talking about it that is an issue. Communication is key. If its because she often withholds sex you even more need to talk about it. If she refuses to change that behavior, then its time to leave sadly :(. It's your choice, but there are many women out there who will show you more affection than you are currently getting.

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rebelwithmouseyhair 17
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I agree that they need to talk this through. But, you think refusing to have sex is bad behaviour? Her feelings don't count? When he's upset her mother? That doesn't count as bad behaviour? Wow. If my partner was rude to my mother, for example, I wouldn't feel hot for him.

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Frank Thomas 2
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Seems most of the comments are missing the point that she’s upset that he didn’t NOTICE that he’s currently on a ban. Still needs to move on from what is either a toxic situation or, at the very least, a bad match.

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