Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML
Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend, who is a fully-grown man, that making dinosaur noises in public is no longer acceptable. FML
Today, I spotted my dad watching a wildlife/nature video. I pointed out to him that the animal on the screen was critically endangered; he rebutted by telling me that it's impossible for the animal on the screen to go extinct because people keep hunting it. FML
Today, as part of his quest to annoy me, my husband pointed out that for every Disney movie I love, it was someone on the animating team's job to animate the boob jiggle physics, as in it was literally their job to animate how the breasts of Ariel, Elsa and Belle move. So many movies ruined. FML
Today, during a moment of silence at a wedding, my phone rang at full volume. My ringtone? The Jurassic Park theme. Everyone turned to stare as I fumbled desperately to shut it off. The bride spent the rest of the ceremony giving me the side-eye. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. The movie was in 3D, and he couldn't help but notice it would be much cooler if you could feel what the characters did. He spent the next two hours slapping me every time the person in the movie did, claiming the movie would be "better". FML
Today, I explained to my five year-old son that the dinosaurs were wiped out because of a meteorite that hit our planet. He replied, "They should've stood out of the way." FML
Today, at work, I was discussing animated movies with a male senior who's got kids. I was trying to refer to Zootopia but couldn't remember the name. I went, "Zoo, zoo... filia?" Silence. It wasn't until I got home an hour later that I realized what I said. FML
Today, I went to see Star Wars with my brother. The entire time he talked about how scientifically inaccurate and improbable the entire movie was. FML
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Top comments
woainishamu 21
Did a dinosaur teach him his education?
DooleyFTW 17
It is amazing though to be honest! Like in the cars movie, it must've taken a really talented car trainer to make them all talk so perfectly!
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Comments (81)
woainishamu 21
Did a dinosaur teach him his education?
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
He married a wife with no ability to intake sarcasm. F his L
luckylucas26 9
Ummm... Your grammar skills are also prehistoric.
MichellinMan 20
^ ummmm... There's actually nothing wrong with said person's grammatical skills.
Kamon97 23
Hey Ms. Frizzle can teach anyone anything ;p
luckylucas26 9
Except that it reads like a 4 year old wrote it. Did a dinosaur educate him?
swaggalikethat 22
But it IS hypothesized that if Dinosaurs were still alive, we'd be able to domesticate them. Just my two cents, but really Op, you lack a sense of humor.
TheCanucklehead 22
Now there are things that are funny and those that are not. 'Jokes' about spelling can be classified as LAME!
rebellionwars 11
This was very dumb of you to say. If he didn't know that the dinosaurs were fake how the hell do you think they could give him an education?
CocaColaPepsi 13
Every time I read your comments I'm amazed at how dumb you are.
mpsteve137 15
If you know him well enough to marry him shouldn't you know that he might be lacking a bit of common sense?
Arrow44 10
"Plot twist" What is they actually used real dinosaurs but exterminated them after the series was over.
yoshithecat 15
Oh! The first plot twist ever! *sits excitedly waiting to see something interesting happen*
ptoka 20
Thanks 64, I read that in Milton's voice and now can't get his voice out of my head!
its2lu 11
Wow...
HeyHeyFishFillet 34
is what you thought when you read this FML and the shock left you incappable of writing a thoughtful comment?
MichellinMan 20
3# are you ******* new here?! Everyone knows your comment has to be hilarious and or sympathetic of OP to even get one thumbs up.
thatgirl1299 11
If your comment consists of one word u might want to keep it to yourself
caden_bro 9
"One word, you might want to keep it to yourself."
StompinOnCrayons 15
Well guys, think of it from #3's point of view, she's still 'wow..'ed and amazed someone trained those dinos
StompinOnCrayons 15
Well, just hope future children inherit your commonsense , not his.
scarletclaw 11
Commonsense isn't so common any more.
StompinOnCrayons 15
I agree. Do you reckon FML is a sanctuary full of people with not-so-common common-sense ?
MichellinMan 20
I think the common sense of the people with not-so-common sense is pretty terrible, and the people with legitimate common sense are the real people with common sense. Common sense.
IHATEFMYLIFE 26
Umm yea I'm amazed he found someone who agreed to marry him. She obviously didn't marry him for his intellect.
DanielleinDC 34
I think it's best that OP's husband doesn't breed. Did he go to a religious school or did he skip his science classes?
QueenJay81 13
seriously, if #3 felt like saying wow, why does it bother any of u??? leave her alone, wow says alot
StompinOnCrayons 15
#94 I think you posted on the wrong comment, and if you don't know already, the FML community is quick to judge, good or bad - BUT we get results.
DooleyFTW 17
It is amazing though to be honest! Like in the cars movie, it must've taken a really talented car trainer to make them all talk so perfectly!
heyyoitskiraaa 10
What about toys! So much talent!
MichellinMan 20
Or The Walking Dead? Those ******* aren't even alive!
Dawnstempest 17
Or the train in Unstoppable. "I need you to act like you are a runaway train. Ready? Action."
LowExpectations 30
The greatest feet in training animals was in that movie Sharknado. How the hell they teach those sharks to fly I'll never know.
Lilxpie 18
#54 All those trains in "Thomas The Tank Engine" must have been trained very well to act like humans.
btob143 6
If I could, I would give all of u 2 thumbs up
dman1997 5
He's right. I've always wondered how they trained the T-Rex's.
kurodansei 16
I'm more concerned with the velociraptors they're oh so clever.
xXxGraveStonexXx 20
I want a T-Rex! Do you know where I can get one??? :DD
JMichael 26
Hopefully he was messing with you.
Welshite 40
Surely I can't be the only one who wants to cuddle a mastodon. And those raptors; they're such gentle creatures. I dunno why people call them vicious.
beelee1988 13
I've always wanted to get a big bear hug from a raptor. They seem so lovable and cuddly.
StompinOnCrayons 15
OP, this is a perfect chance to use you sarcasm - try "Yes, I hear they let you pet them as well "
17deanju 2
I think he was just messin with you OP