Pet peeve
Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML
Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
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Today, I addressed my district manager as "Dude." FML
Today, after telling my boss about my hearing problem, she simply told me to "listen harder". FML
Today, my colleague yet again misused the word "literally." It's driving me insane. I have to work opposite him and hear him say things like he's just "literally shit himself inside out." FML
Today, coming home after a hard day's work was so relaxing. FML
Today, a customer berated me and told me to stop whining because I have to work on the weekend. What did I do to deserve this? I said, "Hi, how are you doing today?" FML
Today, at work I got a message from some dude trying to flirt with me. While I was cracking up and making fun of him with my friends, I get a message from him saying look directly behind you, and there he was staring at me. FML
Today, I was kneeling down at work to do some cleaning. My co-worker said, "Oh don't your knees hurt, kneeling like that for so long?" Without thinking how it sounded, I said, "Oh no, it's not a problem. I'm on my knees all the time." He's yet to stop hitting on me. FML
Today, I had to deal with yet another day of people looking at my name tag and saying "You know nothing, John Snow." with a shit-eating grin, like they're the wittiest people alive. Then I had to deal with my boss telling me to lighten up, because it's "just a joke". FML
Today, I'm depressed. After trying to talk to my boss about it, twice, as it has been affecting my work, I've been told to, "Stop thinking about it" and to, "Man up." He has also told me to come to him with any problems I'm having, and to be honest with him. FML
Today, I learned that working while taking muscle relaxers is not as fun as it sounds. FML
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Top comments
paprikacha 9
This is only an FML if you lost your cool at the end of the day and proceeded to beat him to a bloody pulp with a stapler, then ended up involved in 3-hour high speed cop chase on the internet, and are now posting from the iPhone you managed to hide in your rectum before being incarcerated, where you are currently waiting for a 6'5 man named Blondie to come in and 'show you a good time'.
honutattoo 0
haha he was probably high
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Comments (163)
tagyrrpregnant 0
if you guy's don't like this FML so much, why are you commenting?? I thought it was a funny concept. :P this site community has gotten really uptight since it first launched.
Quest_ 13
This sounds how the extremely early FMLs used to sound.
dkhere 0
No no, I feel the pain... many of my coworkers tell me to "chill" every time I walk by. I don't even say anything. I mean wtf. If I ask them to stop, it's an even bigger incentive to them to keep telling me to "chill". Fighting back only backfires on you.
startafire 0
Relax, dude.
lazylacey 0
that's just annoying... ahhhh. lol
bidoof_fml 0
Relax dude
ohSNAPyall 26
On a side note... *mashes the keypad to order dialing wand*
KFJ943 0
I once went all angry to work... Boss: "start cutting hedges!" Me: "Uh, ROAR!"
kdinsfrestar 0
I think this is the best fml in ages. The first time it happened you would grit your teeth and it would be forgotten. The second time you would tell them to shut up. The fourth time you would crumple up paper in your hands. The 9th time you would have some kind of mental breakdown. The 15th you would just want to start fires.
dkhere 0
lovely way to say it!
pitbullmom 0
maybe if he'd have thrown a 'chilax' just to shake things up.......
Mx_Rider 6
LMFAO number 30 ^_^
transcedental 18
so.. i guess you didnt relax after all. what a shame. a whole day went all for nothing xD