Controlling

By I'mmessedup - 26/04/2022 14:00

Today, I think the only reason my mom hosts my kid's birthday, and other parties at her huge house in the country, is so she can be a complete bitch to us on the day, and if we even sound annoyed, it's, "Well, this is my home, I don't have to open it to anyone." FML
I agree, your life sucks 743
You deserved it 240

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It’s possible she resents always being asked to host these events and doesn’t want/know how to say no. Do you visit her otherwise? How often? It may be a passive aggressive thing rather than a power move. Hosting is stressful af and she may not handle it well. A few options here. When you host events at her place, try to do as much as you can to help out and minimize the stress to her. Also be sure to reach out and visit when you’re *not* having an event so she doesn’t feel used. Or hold the events somewhere else. Just try it once - a public park, or rent a hall, or something - and see how it goes and how she reacts. - Does she seem grateful/more relaxed? (Indicates she just gets stressed out with hosting and doesn’t know how to say no.) - Express disappointment that you didn’t ask to have it at her place? (She likes to host and just doesn’t know how to handle stress so comes across bitchy.) - Or anger/resentment that it’s elsewhere? (Indicates she likes to have it at her house and just be an asshole as a power move.) However she reacts can define what you do moving forward.

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That's the only reason? Seems like there are many easier ways to be bitchy. Chuck E. Cheese's isn't a great alternative because that mouse is a mean bastard who is always drunk and spewing racist and body-shaming garbage!

It’s possible she resents always being asked to host these events and doesn’t want/know how to say no. Do you visit her otherwise? How often? It may be a passive aggressive thing rather than a power move. Hosting is stressful af and she may not handle it well. A few options here. When you host events at her place, try to do as much as you can to help out and minimize the stress to her. Also be sure to reach out and visit when you’re *not* having an event so she doesn’t feel used. Or hold the events somewhere else. Just try it once - a public park, or rent a hall, or something - and see how it goes and how she reacts. - Does she seem grateful/more relaxed? (Indicates she just gets stressed out with hosting and doesn’t know how to say no.) - Express disappointment that you didn’t ask to have it at her place? (She likes to host and just doesn’t know how to handle stress so comes across bitchy.) - Or anger/resentment that it’s elsewhere? (Indicates she likes to have it at her house and just be an asshole as a power move.) However she reacts can define what you do moving forward.