Intimacy: Caught red-handed

Caught red-handed

By caught - 09/01/2012 00:43 - United States

Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 324

You deserved it 36 278

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Andrew - 24/09/2010 10:22 - United States

Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 259

You deserved it 4 577

Lock your doors

By Anonymous - 27/05/2019 00:14

Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 422

You deserved it 739

Play it cool

By Fraser - 08/03/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 200

You deserved it 56 603

Arse!

By Anonymous - 09/09/2019 12:00 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I was watching TV with my grandma. She was looking for the remote, blindly trying to put her hand into the sofa. Instead, she shoved her hand down the back of my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 546

You deserved it 230

By Isabell - 06/02/2010 05:31 - Australia

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 744

You deserved it 5 862

How could you?

By Anonymous - 29/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me jerking it in her bathroom. I'm a 40 year-old man and she's 68. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 639

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 05:28 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 072

You deserved it 2 787

By Cynical - 30/03/2009 03:49 - United States

Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 166

You deserved it 37 092

Keep your wits about you

By Rawr - 30/12/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was really horny after some dirty texts from my boyfriend. Since everyone seemed to be sleeping, I closed my eyes and started to touch myself. I was really close to climaxing when I opened my eyes and made eye contact with my mother staring at me as I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 449

You deserved it 11 667

Late reaction

By fuck - 22/01/2020 14:00 - Canada - Airdrie

Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 330

You deserved it 660

blondie1208 17

Monday 9 January 2012 3:41

so how did the conversation with grandma go?

ZebulonPike 8

Monday 9 January 2012 3:40

Owned!

Comments

UnluckyDude96 8

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:34

Probably didn't hear it.

awthmt 6

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:57

Dont you just hate when parents do that

rpool0788 0

Thursday 12 January 2012 7:54

Off topic a little but what does op stand for I'm new to this app

XxM3MphizxX 6

Thursday 12 January 2012 18:16

U should message me ????

bernielove89 12

Friday 13 January 2012 4:04

Hahaha, this is the best. I hope to, one day, be an awesome mom like that.

bernielove89 12

Friday 13 January 2012 4:06

Hahaha, this is the best. I hope to, one day, be an awesome mom like that.

The_werd 0

Saturday 14 January 2012 22:39

Lock the door!

HBK408 0

Sunday 15 January 2012 8:54

She should of let you finished!!

chubby_choco 17

Wednesday 18 January 2012 0:18

...why were you playing with yourself someplace where your mom could catch you..?

KEEK17 5

Sunday 29 January 2012 7:04

so boredom leads to masturbation?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I asked a girl at work out, who'd claimed she was single. Not ten minutes later, our boss fired me. Turns out that girl is actually his side chick he cheats on his wife with, even though she’s 19 and he’s 48. Not illegal, just scummy as hell, and he fired me out of jealousy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 100

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 242

You deserved it 37 869

The Top

Today, I graduated from college and my parents gave me an apple. Not the computer, the fruit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 223

You deserved it 5 639

Today, my sister is nursing an injured cat back to health in our home because she accidentally hit it with her car. Now I can't decide which is contributing more to my insomnia: the incessant meowing, or the constant itching because our house is infested with fleas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 469

You deserved it 3 474

Today, my hairdresser apologised because he couldn't distinguish the hair from the back of my head from the hair from my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 478

You deserved it 8 845

Today, I had to get stitches on my foot and was then forced to wear a plastic bag on my foot while showering. The plastic bag made me slip in the shower and had to go back and get stitches in my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 710

You deserved it 3 848

Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 2 187

Today, my roommate invited a couple of homeless gentlemen in to our house. After drinking all our beer, throwing up on our carpet, and repeatedly asking if we were planning on killing them, I asked them to leave. My roommate told them they're welcome back anytime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 118

You deserved it 2 044