Call the police

By Anonymous - 10/06/2021 22:00 - Australia - Abbotsford

Today, I was looking at my pictures and there are none of me and my boyfriend together. The only photographic evidence of our relationship are pictures of bruises he has given me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 140
You deserved it 250

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I am very sorry this is happening to you but you need to get out! I mean now, as soon as possible. Take all your stuff away when he is not looking and move out. Block his number, remove social media and all. When you are safe take all the evidence: photos of bruises, texts and all and go to the police. What he is doing is not okay. He may tell you otherwise, but he will not change. If he is hitting you now, it will only get worse because he knows he has hold on you. You safety is important no matter what and you don't deserve to be treated like that.

Comments

Why are you jumping to the conclusion that she's being abused? The bruising could be from kinky, consensual activities.

It could be completely innocent… I’m not defending anything but my boyfriend had given me bruises by just holding me down to tickle me. But in saying that it could be totally sinister

I am very sorry this is happening to you but you need to get out! I mean now, as soon as possible. Take all your stuff away when he is not looking and move out. Block his number, remove social media and all. When you are safe take all the evidence: photos of bruises, texts and all and go to the police. What he is doing is not okay. He may tell you otherwise, but he will not change. If he is hitting you now, it will only get worse because he knows he has hold on you. You safety is important no matter what and you don't deserve to be treated like that.

Why are you assuming it's abuse? It could very well be bruising from rough but consensual activities. Jumping to conclusions.

If it was consensual, I suppose it would have been said in the FML...I am not 'jumping to conclusion', I'm making reasonnable assumption based on the data provided.

She didn't say anything about abuse either. We simply don't know. I don't assume she's in a BDSM relationship...only presented it as a possibility. Abuse is not ok, and of course she should get out if that's what's going on. I'm just saying she just said she has bruises...didn't specify either way.

She also didn't mention abuse. There are 2 explanations...consensual BDSM activities, OR abuse. the o.p. didn't mention either. Yet, you assume the worst.

no you're making the completely wrong assumption. if the issue was him hurting her that would have been stated. if she's getting bruised from bedroom activities op wouldn't state that and it would be none of your business anyway.

Oh come on FML. I can see why you wouldn’t want links or phone numbers in comments, but putting a country’s National Abuse Hotline link and phone number in a comment to an FML that shows signs of an abusive relationship should be allowed. Shame on you FML, I attempted to post Australia’s link twice and it never showed up. Common sense staff of FML, in this case, the link/phone number should be allowed

Edit: here are the website and number Mike sent me https://www.1800respect.org.au/ 1800 737 732.

Well some guys hate taking pictures, As far as the bruises, If he’s abusing you then of course that’s completely unacceptable and you should in no way stick around.

the first bruise should have been the last. leave his ass

Again, bruises could be the result of consensual activities. O.P. didn't specify abuse or consent.

I am absolutely against abuse. However, there is context about the bruises missing. It is possible, she could be in a consensual BDSM relationship. And the bruises are the only proof she is in a relationship.

emenjivar 7

That was my first thought..context is important! But if we’re wrong then yes run!!

I understand the need for context, but given that there has been no mention of consensual BDSM, then it can only be assumed that there is abuse taking place. In any case, why would she take photos of bruises she received during said activity? If she showed them to anyone, couldn't that lead to a false arrest and charges?

Why take photos? Because people who are into this sort of thing like seeing the photos of the marks left. Could it be used against the Top/Dom? Yes, absolutely. That's why trustworthiness is so important for both parties...the bottom/sub to trust their limits won't be crossed and the safe-word will be respected...and the Top/Dom has to trust that their partner won't later have "buyers remorse" or try to use evidence of consensual activity as revenge later.

As someone in the BDSM lifestyle, some people do enjoy having pictures of bruising from consensual kink. Kind of like, taking pride in enjoying an activity, others might see as taboo.

So, if consent isn't mentioned, you assume it's abuse. But yet, abuse isn't mentioned, so you can't fathom consent. So why the double standard?

op has no reason to say anything about her sex life and the fact that you're assuming she should is worrying. this is nothing other than you assuming the worst for no good reason. for all you know they like to get kinky and take sexy pictures for use later (something like a butt shot with spank marks).

I mean, there's nothing I can say here to get you to do what should be done

Everyone is jumping to the conclusion that this is an abusive relationship.It's possible the bruises are the result of rough, kinky, CONSENSUAL activities.

I hope the bruises are from consensual kinky activities. If so, tell your bf to take pictures with you. if you're being abused, get out of the relationship as fast as you can!

Get the **** out of there, take the photos and any evidence you can. If you're still there and if you can, try to record the abuse. Anyway you can. Once you get out, report his shit-**** self to the police. I'm really sorry you have to/have had to live through that nightmare. No matter what some people try to say, nobody deserves that. You can get counselling online and over the phone.

you're really flying through assumptions to reach the conclusion you want huh?

Okay, I have to ask. Why would I want such a conclusion? And yes the abuse angle MAY be an assumption, however, there has been no mention nor follow up that in any way clarifies the situation. I have said, earlier in the comment chain, that the need for context is understood, but without clarification, not to mention the phrasing of the post, I can only assume the worst. I really hope I am wrong and the OP clears up this unfortunate matter, but until then I still say she needs to get, go far and get help.