Kids, Health Awkward Blood rat

Blood rat

jadalee8290 - 30/07/2022 16:00 - United States - Shallotte

Today, while we're on vacation, my 6 year-old son barged in the bathroom as I was changing my tampon. He was horrified and kept screaming, asking why I “pulled a blood rat out of my butt.” FML

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Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

2young4birds&bees - 24/10/2016 15:53

Today, while changing my tampon in a public restroom, a toddler crawled under the door of my stall and asked what I was doing. I had to wait until I'd finished to open the door and let her out. FML

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Amplified

Anonymous - 01/09/2010 23:04 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

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Anonymous - 03/07/2015 20:51 - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

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Tressa95 - 25/02/2018 18:30 - United States - Belleville

Today, I walked into a public restroom and, to my utter surprise, saw a lady squeezing blood out of used tampons. We made eye contact, she continued, and I ran out in horror. FML

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Crime scene

isuckatlife - 22/02/2009 03:16 - United States

Today, while changing my tampon in the stall of my high school's bathroom, I lost control of the plastic applicator. The blood-covered apparatus shot out like a rocket underneath the stall door. For a moment I thought no one noticed, then the screaming began. FML

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tbree - 19/09/2014 22:38 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

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Revealing

doody - 30/12/2009 22:42 - United States

Today, I was in a busy airport bathroom with my three year-old son. While in the process of pulling my pants down, my son decided to open the stall door. I jumped up to yank the door closed, but not before the line of waiting women saw me with my pants wrapped around my ankles. FML

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Anonymous - 27/03/2013 08:00 - United States - Temecula

Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML

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Scaredshitless - 03/02/2010 13:48 - France

Today, after waiting to get home to go to the bathroom, my six year old neighbor popped out and literally scared the shit out of me. FML

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Shouldn't have worn a thong...

Shouldn'taWornaThong - 10/02/2018 07:00 - United States - Tempe

Today, while shopping at my local grocery store, a young boy came up behind me and pulled my pants down while snickering. I was so shocked and horrified that I dropped the f-bomb. His mother yelled at me for "ruining his innocence". FML

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spinningrecords 14

Sunday 31 July 2022 1:16

Well shit! That is probably the most scarring thing that could happen to the little guy but dang it’s also funny.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 30 July 2022 22:04

"Because I'm just that ******' tough!" Next time you tell him to finish his vegetables, he's gonna finish his goddamn vegetables!

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 30 July 2022 22:04

"Because I'm just that ******' tough!" Next time you tell him to finish his vegetables, he's gonna finish his goddamn vegetables!

spinningrecords 14

Sunday 31 July 2022 1:16

Well shit! That is probably the most scarring thing that could happen to the little guy but dang it’s also funny.

spinningrecords 14

Sunday 31 July 2022 1:18

Well shit! That is probably the most scarring thing that could happen to the little guy but dang it’s also funny.

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Sunday 31 July 2022 2:13

Well, he's learned to knock now hopefully.

Hangryko 31

Monday 13 February 2023 16:55

Hopefully OP also learned to lock the door first.

JasonThorn 20

Sunday 31 July 2022 4:07

"Hey, son! Welcome to your first game of 'Screwed Around and Found Out!' Thanks for playing!"

Hangryko 31

Sunday 31 July 2022 7:20

Why didn't you lock the bathroom door?

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Today, as I was helping a customer, she asked if it was my first day and who was training me. Evidently, I'm bad at my job, because I've worked there for 7 months. FML

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Today, I asked my mom why she drinks. She said she only drinks when she's depressed. My step-dad said she only drinks on the weekend. Those are the days I'm at her house. FML

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Today, just like every other day, I was woken up 2 hours earlier than I needed to be, by the alarm belonging to my upstairs neighbors. They won't wake up until their real alarm goes off: me, pounding the walls and yelling in frustration. FML

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Today, I sent my wife to a 5 hour spa day. She's now upset because she had to wait to get a pedicure, and the house wasn’t clean when she got home. We have a toddler and I was playing with her, running errands, and cooking us a family dinner. She's a stay at home mom. FML

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Today, while driving me to the airport for a trip to Japan, my mother started crying. When I asked her why, she said, "I just know that if the plane crashes, I will never see you again because you are going to hell." Thank you, mom. I love you too. FML

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Today, my brother stole my hard drive and wiped it. My hard drive had a 10-page school project on it. The project is due tomorrow. FML

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