Today, in our microbiology lab, there's a machine called bacteria incubator, which translates to Arabic as "bacteria hugger." I envied the bacteria because it gets hugs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at work in a lab. I spent all day growing a large bacterial culture. I went to retrieve it, only to find that someone had turned the incubation shaker up too high, and my flask had flown off and shattered. Not only did I lose all my work, but now the whole room is a biohazard. FML
Today, at the microbiology lab, I discovered that the guy who took the shift before me didn't sterilize the work space very well. I am now blowing chunks from both ends from a very nasty strain of E. Coli. My company blames me. FML
Today, I was teaching my microbiology lab class as a graduate TA. Some dumbass frat boy dared his friend to drink a tube of E. coli and the idiot did it. Now everything in the lab is contaminated with vomit. FML
Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML
Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
Today, while clearing out my kitchen, I discovered a Tupperware container that'd been forgotten for so long it'd developed its own ecosystem. When I opened it, a funky smell engulfed the kitchen, and I realized I had unintentionally created a new form of life. I promptly closed the container, then put it in the freezer in the hope of killing whatever it is. FML
Today, I finally got round to cleaning out my refrigerator. As I reached the back, I found an unidentifiable, moldy object lurking in the corner. Upon closer inspection, I realized it was once a cucumber. I'm growing science experiments in my fridge. FML
Today, after two rounds of antibiotics, I got a yeast infection. My husband started calling me "Yeasty." FML
Today, my girlfriend referred to her yeast infection as "making bread." I can never look at bread the same way. FML
Today, I was asked to translate for a family in Arabic since I’m the only one in my office who speaks Arabic. Turns out the family is actually from Bangladesh. They speak Bengali. When I explained this to my coworker he replied, “But aren’t y’all Middle Easterns related or something?” FML
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Top comments
Inkoseh 33
Well, I don't think you'd like hugging bacteria. Not exactly a pleasure..
RichardPencil 32
Maybe you ought to squeeze yourself into that machine and get you some hugs!
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Comments (2)
Inkoseh 33
Well, I don't think you'd like hugging bacteria. Not exactly a pleasure..
RichardPencil 32
Maybe you ought to squeeze yourself into that machine and get you some hugs!