Infinimaster · 7 March 2025, 09:00 ·Gainesville, United States

Giving up my exes for Lent

Today, I was having a great night, until I went to church for Ash Wednesday. I walked in the door and let the other ushers know I was there. All was going fine until I happened to glance over at the front doors of the church and see my ex walking in. My mood was shit for the rest of the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173 You deserved it 404

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Anonymous · 16 February 2025, 00:00 ·Singapore, Singapore

Never go back

Today, I'm contemplating messaging my ex. It's been 5 months since I quietly moved on after he started ignoring me, or telling me that he was actually planning a date by asking me if a shirt looked good on him. It did look good on him and he's probably moved on too, while I've spent the last 5 months thinking about him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 168 You deserved it 486

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Anonymous · 14 February 2025, 03:00 ·United States

Ambition

Today, I saw my ex, who had dumped me for not being “ambitious” enough. I'd said she was just a gold digger and would die alone. She looked amazing at the fanciest, most expensive restaurant in town, and was celebrating being made partner at her law firm. I was bussing tables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 169 You deserved it 890

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Anonymous · 9 February 2025, 03:00 ·Atlanta, United States

Freeloader

Today, I found out that I have at least stage 3 cancer. I went on my insurance's website to get information for the doctors. I also saw "Other people who have been on your plan." My ex-wife was listed, with a new last name. She got remarried. I'm just going to let the cancer take me at this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521 You deserved it 115

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Gracie · 27 January 2025, 00:00 ·Cork, Ireland

Out of sight

Today, I thought I saw my ex in a crowded café, so I ducked behind a counter to avoid them. It turns out that I was hiding from a random stranger, while the barista thought I was trying to steal muffins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125 You deserved it 551

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C.J · 27 December 2024, 00:00 ·Henderson, United States

It's the most wonderful time of the year…

Today, I found out I'm "no longer under consideration" for all 8 of the jobs I recently applied for. I'm broke and stuck living with my ex, who's got a new boyfriend. I hate my life and myself, wish I was dead every day, and am stuck in retail hell for the foreseeable future. I barely eat and exist only to work and sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 478 You deserved it 161

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stardad · This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff ·United States

May the force live long and prosper

Today, my ex purposely taught our kids to call all the Star Wars characters by Star Trek names. I’m not sure what bothers me more, the fact that she did it, or the fact that it makes me utterly insane when they say them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 851 You deserved it 605

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Anonymous · 4 December 2024, 03:00 ·Portland, United States

Not worth it

Today, out of the kindness of my heart, and so he wouldn't have to spend any money, I gave my ex-boyfriend my login information to my Vudu account. Big mistake. He logged me out of all devices, changed the password, and won't give me the new login information until I give him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265 You deserved it 805

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Anonymous · 26 November 2024, 09:00 ·United States

Stuck in the middle

Today, I have COVID. My almost ex-wife is taking our kid to Thanksgiving with her family, but asked if he could stay longer with me (while I'm in quarantine), I said OK, no energy to argue, but she pushed and when I said, "If he's negative and has no symptoms it seems unnecessary" she screamed, "I DON'T WANT TO KILL MY PARENTS!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 263 You deserved it 437

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Anonyme · 25 November 2024, 00:00 ·United States

Small world

Today, I went to my local grocery store in sweatpants and slippers to pick up some hangover food, thinking I wouldn’t run into anyone I know. I ran into my ex, her new partner, and his parents… twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341 You deserved it 329

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I’m not like other guys! · 24 November 2024, 15:00 ·Anaheim, United States

Never gonna give you up

Today, my crazy ex has scared off yet another great woman. Thanks to all the douchebags that use “crazy ex” as an excuse to for their own shit behavior, no one believes me that mine is legitimately crazy. I didn’t cheat or mistreat her, I left because of her control and jealousy issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505 You deserved it 114

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Anonymous · 15 November 2024, 15:00 ·South Africa

Backhanded

Today, I miss someone I shouldn’t. Someone who made me feel like complete shit, but I hope they're happy wherever they are, and they take care of themselves. I hope they heal with their family. I hope they are good and things workout for them. That they realise how awful they were and finally change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 194 You deserved it 410

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Anonymous · 14 November 2024, 22:00 ·Darwin, Australia

Never going back

Today, I had to awkwardly stand next to my ex in a grocery store because our self-checkout machines froze at the same time. Our break up was quite acrimonious so we both tried to play it cool while the attendant came to fix them. They took their fucking time as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394 You deserved it 120

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Clayton · 12 November 2024, 12:00 ·United States

An accident?

Today, I lost yet another girlfriend because my ex tells every girl I go out with that I cheated on her. She DMs them screenshots of what I did. I know I’m no saint, but all that was 6 months ago, and it was an accident. I can’t change the past, but I can be sorry for what I did. I just can’t win in this situation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127 You deserved it 1 283

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Anonymous · 2 November 2024, 00:00 ·United Kingdom

Cut them off

Today, I was yelled at by my ex's best friend and ex-partner. Long story short, I cheated and no, it wasn't right and wasn't a good thing to do, but now I'm being told he has the right to remind me everyday and make sure I never forget my mistakes, and that they are supposed to make sure I never fall out of line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 159 You deserved it 805

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Geeee · 30 October 2024, 09:00 ·United States

Eyes on the prize

Today, my ex, who “didn’t believe in posting our relationship on social media”, has no problem posting his new girlfriend and showing her off. He acts like he won a very valuable prize with her, and I was left in the shadows for the whole year we dated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470 You deserved it 137

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Alex · 12 October 2024, 09:00 ·United States

I can't catch a break

Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend, who I thought was finally out of my life for good, is now dating my new manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430 You deserved it 72

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mylovelifeisanepicfail · This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff ·London, United Kingdom

Catfished

Today, I discovered that the man I have been talking to on a dating site is actually my ex-boyfriend. He created a fake profile and made me fall for someone that doesn't exist. We got on better anonymously than we ever did in 3 years together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 251 You deserved it 3 982

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Anonymous · 7 October 2024, 16:00 ·United States

There's still hope, then?

Today, my abusive ex came over to my apartment, hoping to "work things out." Not only did we break up more than 13 years ago, but I moved to a different state just to get away from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622 You deserved it 76

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Anonymous · 5 October 2024, 22:00 ·Cape Town, South Africa

I can fix him

Today, I realised I'm like the Mary Poppins of dating. I keep meeting these broken men, I help them through their stuff, only for them to date someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413 You deserved it 137

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Harriett · 27 September 2024, 06:00 ·Vancouver, Canada

I'm fine, this is fine

Today, I was out shopping with my friends when I saw my ex. I instinctively tried to hide by quickly turning around and walking into a store. It was a mirror. I walked straight into my own reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249 You deserved it 339

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anon · 23 September 2024, 20:00 ·Montréal, Canada

His type

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mom stared at me throughout dinner before finally blurting out, "I'm sorry, I can't get past the fact that you look just like his ex!" It turns out I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 549 You deserved it 82

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jakob the small twink · 22 September 2024, 22:00 ·Fallbrook, United States

Inferiority complex

Today, I pulled up to a party/house rave. I was told there were a decent amount of women there. I guess they'd all left by the time I arrived. The only girl I saw there was my ex-girlfriend, who left me without a trace last month, dancing with a bunch of guys who were all physically way bigger than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375 You deserved it 180

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expassword · This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff ·United States

Never forget

Today, I asked my wife for her computer password because my computer crashed. After minutes of begging her, she finally told me. Turns out that her password happens to be her ex's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 559 You deserved it 3 836

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Anonymous · 17 September 2024, 20:00 ·United States

Miss you

Today, I saw a text from my mom asking, “Are you still with that girl from last year? I miss her.” She was talking about my ex. The girl I’m dating now saw the message before I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 487 You deserved it 97

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Anonymous · 10 September 2024, 22:00 ·United Kingdom

Mother of the year

Today, my ex-wife brought the kids to me angry that she had tried to pick up some guy but the kids ruined it just by being there, so she brought them to my house because she couldn’t be bothered this week. The judge giving her primary custody is a travesty of our legal system. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640 You deserved it 103

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Daria_Weiner · This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff ·Russian Federation

Freudian slip

Today, at my anniversary party, and in front of all our friends, I accidentally called my husband-to-be by my ex-boyfriend's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 598 You deserved it 49 214

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Anonymous · 4 September 2024, 14:00 ·San Diego, United States

Sneaking around

Today, my ghosting ex-girlfriend's Snapchat has gone from "2+ mutual friends" to "20+ mutual friends" in the past month. Seems like she fucks with everyone I know, except for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193 You deserved it 356

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Anonymous · 21 August 2024, 12:00 ·Ulan Bator, Mongolia

You only know what you've got when it's gone

Today, I broke my own no contact rule with my ex, begging him to come back. He simply replied, "Stop begging. It's over." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 You deserved it 863

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Anonymous · 18 August 2024, 00:00 ·L'Assomption, Canada

Interference

Today, I found out that my "I don't care about boy problems" friend decided it would be a great idea to talk to my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend about me. My ex was the one who told me. He thought I'd asked my friend to do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386 You deserved it 119

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