By Anonymous - 09/08/2012 10:50 - United States
hassi158
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Beginner
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Supersize Menu
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
The thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Happy ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
Santa Claus
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Inception
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
The Mixer
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I agree, my mouse works.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
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Work is a 4-letter word
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
50 favorites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
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Happy month-versary
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The return of the thumb
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I liked to the power of 20
You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
Hassi158's favorite FMLs
By Anonymous - 17/08/2012 16:45 - United States - Brighton
By CollegeBound - 17/08/2012 19:55 - United States - Tully
Scapegoat blues
By Anonymous - 17/08/2012 22:16 - Canada
By Anonymous - 18/08/2012 00:20 - United States
By SuzyTurquoiseBlu - 29/08/2012 05:32 - Australia - Fairfield
SuzyTurquoiseBlu tells us more.
By Geckosrock99 - 31/08/2012 02:45 - United States - Riverbank
Geckosrock99 tells us more.
OP here. First of all, I'm nineteen. The ninety-nine in my username is just a random number. Not my birth year and not the number of geckos I have (or rather, used to have.) The vibrator wasn't running low on batteries. I had just changed them and, unfortunately for me, it was dying for good. I've had my fear of clowns since I was seven, because of that "IT" movie, so hearing that noise in the dark was pretty scary.
By iliveintexas - 01/09/2012 14:09 - United States - Tyler
iliveintexas tells us more.
Hey everyone, in case you're wondering, I have NOT sprayed the nests yet (my dad has informed me there are around 10 nests), but I will be sure to record it, because I am an idiot. PS: Thank you all for the helpful comments, I am aware that I should wear long pants and a long shirt. However (for my favorite comment), in Texas, it is hard to find a cheap steel-forged suit of armor, as well as to craft one. More soon, David (iliveintexas, and author of this FML)
By ugly - 03/09/2012 08:17 - United States
By mfnfhdjdjddjsjfn - 03/09/2012 08:39 - Australia - Sydney
By Cherrish it - 04/09/2012 04:24 - United States - Carmichael
Chlamydia central
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Cloud
By noname1025 - 04/09/2012 16:44 - United States - Lamar
By HeyArnold91 - 14/09/2012 05:57 - United States - Apo
HeyArnold91 tells us more.
By Grindwhore - 17/09/2012 10:46 - Canada - Nanaimo
Grindwhore tells us more.
They have yet to give me a reason why, I'm still confused as hell.
By Oh_So_Klassical - 18/09/2012 01:09 - United States - Lancaster
Oh_So_Klassical tells us more.
OP Here, and I spend up to 3 hours a day on the computer because I take a computer class and all the homework is online and that's why she turned it off. She called our provider and told them to turn it off, since she didn't know how. I didn't find out until I came home and attempted to do my homework, and by that point, my mom was in a fuss about not being able to get on Facebook. And since I'm her daughter, and clearly know nothing, she refused to believe me. My neighbor is the one who finally convinced her the internet was needed for Facebook.
By BeforeItWasCool - 30/09/2012 09:30 - United Kingdom
BeforeItWasCool tells us more.
Wow this seems to have been misinterpreted! It was unplanned, I was entirely surprised by it. We hadn't planned on kids- if it had been positive it would have been an accident. I was just quite happy to have such a nice surprise even if it did turn out to be negative. I was quite disappointed it was negative, not because I've been secretly trying to get pregnant, but because I was pleasantly surprised. It just seems my fiancé was a little too enthusiastic about the negative result.
By SoSexy - 07/10/2012 10:25 - United States - Stockton
SoSexy_fml tells us more.
Hey guys! This is the OP. 1) I honestly don't know, my boyfriend suggested we try filling up a tire with them. 2) Albeit being a bit embarrassed, it was actually quite hilarious for both of us. We're both in our 20s, but we still laugh at bodily functions, immature as that is. That, and I can't exactly see what's happening behind there.
By juliette - 08/10/2012 05:39 - United States - Tucson
Protip
By LovedByFamily - 08/10/2012 15:08 - Germany - Köln
Well, they aren't really liked in the family and I think that its both really rude and sad of them to try and piggy-back their special occasions with mine. My sister in-law and her fiancee got engaged in the waiting room while I was in ACTIVE labour with my daughter and got pissed off that everyone wasn't falling over themselves to congratulate them.