macday2015

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Macday2015's favorite FMLs

By mac cayne - 02/05/2014 03:13 - France - Strasbourg

Today, it's been a week since I found an egg in the street that had seemingly fallen out of a nest. I'd bought a cage and an expensive incubator lamp to save it. It's thus been a week that I've been trying to save a mouldy old potato. FML

agreeclassic 244

vote type 1 454

By kendrox - 02/05/2014 07:11 - United States - Auburn

Today, a drunken guest in the hotel I work at has barricaded himself in the employee restroom and refuses to come out, unless I "promise to love him forever." It's 4am and I'm the only one here. FML

agreeclassic 43 697

vote type 1 3 314

kendrox app_comment_confession_title

kendrox 12

Tuesday 6 May 2014 8:51

Oh wow I didn't think this would make it on there! Hello everyone, I am the original poster of this FML! No, I did not call the police. In other, more serious situations, I have. I did not say once that he was a danger to me, there was no need for him to get in trouble for this! It just made my night a lot harder! I left him be for a couple hours and when it came time for me to set up breakfast, I knocked on the bathroom door and gave him some coffee. He thanked me the next night. He seemed to be a very sweet man, just very very inebriated...

By Anonymous - 19/05/2012 02:35 - United States

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

agreeclassic 30 521

vote type 1 2 376

By fuq - 22/05/2012 18:42 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, my wife allowed my mother-in-law to move in with us. She believes the government spies on her in the shower, and that the Prime Minister is a shape-shifting lizard who wants to microchip us all. I have to live with this psychotic wench until someone is desperate enough to employ her. FML

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vote type 1 2 780

By me - 19/05/2012 02:41 - United States - Wyandotte

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

agreeclassic 29 143

vote type 1 5 549