Cheerdaisy

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

One more and it's business time

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Cheerdaisy's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 11/09/2009 14:51 - United States

Today, after spending 20 minutes every day working on my abs for the last month and feeling pretty good about how they were looking, I received the first comment about them. A girl poked them and said 'squish'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 035

You deserved it 5 977

sndc_fml tells us more.

sndc_fml 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 1:26

I am the OP and... 1) whoever said it earlier... I am doing the P90X ab ripper 2) I also have been running 2 miles nearly every other day 3) I have also been going to the gym and taking supplements 4) I'm not fat at all, in fact very skinny 5) This was the girl I liked 6) yes, I squished her back

Dick joke

By awilson - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was eating M&Ms on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see me with my hand on my crotch while angrily muttering, "Where's that little bastard gone?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 353

You deserved it 17 026

By Granny - 24/10/2009 21:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having a nice moment with my granddaughter as she was being affectionate by stroking my face. We were both quite content, until she said, "Aw, Grandma, your skin feels just like a crocodile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 984

You deserved it 3 490

By jaydiv - 22/11/2009 09:15 - Australia

Today, I saw my cat outside taking a dump. I pulled back the curtain and watched him clean it up, because I found it fascinating that animals can do that. I must have been standing there for several minutes before I noticed the neighbour next door looking at me being fascinated by my cat pooing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 589

You deserved it 36 470

By IB6UB9 - 28/11/2009 17:32 - United States

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 189

You deserved it 6 979

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 16/12/2009 19:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me that he will never marry me because we are different ethnicities and his parents don't approve. I was of course very upset and crying. His way to comfort me was by saying, "Don't worry, I will always cheat on my wife with you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 311

You deserved it 3 763

By WesJaz - 08/01/2010 16:35 - United States

Today, I was working as a cashier and a woman brought up a suitcase. As I was ringing her up I checked inside like I'm supposed to and I very jokingly say, "Look at all the stuff you're stealing." She laughed nervously then hit me in the head with her heavy purse before running out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 564

You deserved it 4 475

By Tattooed_Blonde - 20/01/2010 12:09 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a little "fun" in our secluded backyard. It was only after we had finished that we noticed the three little girls, who live next door, jumping up and down on their trampoline, with their mouths wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 236

You deserved it 26 991

Tattooed_Blonde tells us more.

Tattooed_Blonde 0

Monday 1 February 2010 11:13

Okay guys settle down. We were caught up in the moment and we figure at first they were only peeking over the fence, and then started jumping. Oh gosh, don't be such prudes :D

By Bailey - 22/08/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 798

You deserved it 14 101