I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay

By axewoman - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 582
You deserved it 3 802
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Top comments

philipino 24

And then you can treat his wood for him ;)

183 4
philipino 24

Or she can cut their dicks off or whatever it's her choice I guess

73 5

Comments

philipino 24

And then you can treat his wood for him ;)

183 4
Welshite 39

You realize lumberjacks chop trees right? "Treating" his wood is possibly the last thing any sane male wants.

18 41
philipino 24

Or she can cut their dicks off or whatever it's her choice I guess

73 5
euphoricness 28

Don't forget the mayonnaise

3 20
kyu_Q 19

I'm with #1 on this. lumberjacks know how to handle good wood.

13 1
False_Stupidity 41

Knowing how to handle good wood is one thing #40 but its more important if she knows how to handle wood good!

18 0
incoherentrmblr 21

How much wood can a Wood Chuck chuck if a Wood Chuck could Chuck Norris?...

0 13
omnia 5

If you do indeed treat his wood right with any luck he will axe you to marry him! I'll show myself out.

5 2
diving_fml 30

at least he knows you'll find someone

62 2
sayyestothedress 24

How much could a wood chuck wood if a wood chuck could chuck wood

3 8
tiptoppc 19

He fell into bed with her? Time to trim those bushes!

0 0
InsanePPG 25

She's a lumberjack and she's okay, she sleeps all night and she works all day.

71 5
kaablam 17

She chops down trees, she wears high heels.

16 2
tony1891 22

so i married an axe murderer?

5 18
laden_swallow09 34

"I put on women's clothing / And hang around in bars."

33 3
jschwandt 5

Well at least he doesn't assume that you're a lesbian

2 12
gracehi 31

Because you are one awesome-in-shape-strong-stereotype-shattering-glass-ceiling-busting girl, right? :)

37 3
vaderismyfriend 27

I sang that in Phineas and Ferbs' "truck-driving-girl" tune

10 4