Intimacy: Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto...

By tingles - 19/01/2013 13:20 - United Kingdom - Solihull

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML

agreeclassic 52 056

vote type 1 8 066

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By MIND BLOWING - 20/10/2012 13:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML

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Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML

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By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

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By fungettingdressed - 12/10/2010 12:57 - United States

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By naughtymommy0317 - 20/06/2013 08:47 - United States

Today, while having sex with my husband, he accidentally elbowed me in the face. I don't know which is worse: that he didn't stop to see if I was OK, or that it seemed to turn him on and he climaxed immediately after he'd hit me. FML

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By onepussytwopussy - 07/03/2014 19:47 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

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By lice - 28/03/2009 13:34 - United States

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend I went into his shower to freshen up. Where I saw an open bottle of pubic lice shampoo. FML

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By Loki16 - 02/06/2016 08:40 - United States - New York

Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML

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Freeze_fml 16

Saturday 19 January 2013 16:12

Clean sex is good sex.

toughchick14 15

Saturday 19 January 2013 16:15

Well at least you know that the sex was 99.9% clean!

Comments

epople 5

Monday 21 January 2013 4:06

Owww... Fyl op.

ModMitchie 5

Wednesday 23 January 2013 13:01

Why didn't he notice his tingly weenie before he put it in you?

Inked0803 12

Thursday 31 January 2013 17:46

Your ****** will never be the same again.

ninjaCow18 11

Wednesday 17 April 2013 5:57

Don't have sex cuz you might reproduce

awesome01austin 0

Monday 26 August 2013 7:47

Why did you need lube are you old and dried out

SWAGG_ON 9

Sunday 17 November 2013 19:01

Think of the good side no disease

FrancesShiver 20

Friday 9 May 2014 8:24

At least you suffer together.

metal_freak_93 4

Tuesday 24 June 2014 20:38

OUCH!!

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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agreeclassic 37 355

vote type 1 5 190

Today, I texted my boss to say I’d be late because my train was delayed. Autocorrect changed “delayed” to “derailed.” My boss called immediately, panicked, asking if I was OK. I had to explain it was just a typo while standing safely on the platform. FML

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Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML

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