Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, the girl who likes me incredibly much asked me if she could come for a ride with me on my motorcycle. Normally this isn't a problem as I take lots of people out for rides for fun, but this time I had no choice but to tell her she couldn't because she's just too heavy for it. FML
Today, I took off the training wheels of my niece's bike. I tried to show her how to ride it, but she told me to get off because I needed a "fat girl's bike." FML
Today, I finally went on a date with a girl I've been talking to for 2 years. She is my dream girl, picture perfect and I love her with all my heart. So I asked her, half jokingly, if I was her dream guy. Her reply? "Don't ask me something you don't want to hear the answer of." FML
Today, in the middle of a hot air balloon ride with my girlfriend, I asked her to marry me. She said no. The rest of the ride was the most awkward two hours of my life. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were gazing into each others' eyes in the moonlight after not having seen each other for a week. I thought he was going to say "I love you" and pull me in for a kiss. Instead, he said, "Since you can’t drive, we should get one of those two seater bicycles." FML
Today, the girl of my dreams, the one person I've met in my life that I could see myself spending the rest of it with, told me she loves me. She then specifically added "...but not in that way, so we could never be together." FML
Today, I went skiing with a girl I like. On the lift I asked her out. She said no. Halfway up the lift stopped. We were stuck up there for nearly an hour. FML
Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He told me he'd have to ask his dad if it was OK. I thought he was just kidding, until he pulled out his phone and called his dad. After a few minutes of "Come on, Dad" and "But why?" he hung up and said his dad wouldn't let him. He's 22. FML
Today, I took a girl I like to a local band’s show. She didn’t want to dance with me, and after the show she got the lead singer’s number and planned to hang out the next day. We’re both 24, this kid just turned 19. She told me she was only into men her age or older. FML
Today, I asked a girl what time she'd like me to pick her up for our date tonight. She didn't know what I was talking about. It seems like, after months of sweaty palms, nervous smiles, and awkward sentences, I only dreamed she said yes to going out. FML
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Top comments
poloisbored 7
You could ask her to teach you, that way you'd spend much more time together.
DocBastard 40
You should feel even worse because "come biking with me" clearly meant "come **** my brains out, big boy." Learn to read between the lines, son.
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Comments (166)
CrookedCook 14
Ask her to help you. She obviously wants to be with you, and if you're up front about something that quite embarrassing (no offense) then she will know hat you trust her. You can imagine her teaching you like a sitcom montage.
reevesyy93 1
Maybe the dark secret is that you think your mums nuts?
MoniqueNicole 5
I'm 15 and don't know how to ride a bike either.
Vacevedo8 0
I'm about to be 20 and I can't ride a bike join the club learn now if you can
CMiraz 2
No lie, I feel you :(
corozean 0
I don't understand this ...my wife can't ride a bike either ...but I don't hold it against her
fluffygirl0306 3
Not to worry dude, I'm sixteen, and I can't either
taltamir 6
Why did you turn her down instead of fessing up and asking her to teach you?
plippoo 5
That might just be your parent's fault.
VampTat 10
If you makes you feel any better, I can't roller skate. Or ice skate. And I didn't learn how to swim until I was 13.