Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML
Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML
Today, after a long time convincing my parents that my boyfriend is really a good guy, not only did he decide to come by the house completely drunk, but he also ended up trying to kiss my mom, thinking it was me. FML
Today, I had to get my boyfriend's mom to help me get my boyfriend in his house because he was so drunk. He broke up with me for getting him in trouble. FML
Today, my mom called me to tell me she'd got in touch with my ex for his birthday, and that the two of them had made a plan for us to get back together. My new boyfriend was in the process of proposing to me. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend called saying she wants to get back together because of how mature and sincere I sounded last night. I despise her and I was drunk last night. FML
Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML
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Top comments
Roskosity 22
But it is her fault that she's a backstabbing ****.
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
That's ****** up!!
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Comments (58)
Mauskau 36
I prefer Jeremy Kyle.
Kiki242 19
My damn. How low can one go?
gloooooria 14
All the way to the floor?
JessicaZado 11
She needs to go for a guy her own age
gloooooria 14
Or a guy who isn't dating her daughter.
ZombieSazza 34
Your Mother crossed a line that should never be ******* crossed. You need to slap the shit out of him and get her told to sling her hook until she can behave like a responsible adult that doesn't betray her child!
Eivana 37
I would shove a lit stick of dynamite up my ****** if I EVER found out that I slept with someone who had previously slept with my mother.
twinkiefeets 17
I totally agree.
boshbish 14
It's easy enough to say you got lucky in getting rid of a loser guy like that, but your own mother? I don't know how I'd cope with that. These things happen and you fall for the right person while youre with another but damn! They both handled it horribly. Looks like you need to have a talk with mum.
Al3xv3l92 24
That's pretty messed up in so many ways especially knowing that one of your family members did it.
middlenamefrank 8
Sounds like mom got game.
MrTaco0007 3
Dont do anything stupid because of your mom. Try to get away from your mom as much as possiblr
liss0711 10
I think Jerry Springer has already had that one multiple times.