Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said they were for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my teacher read my story about a haunted house for a class assignment. She liked it very much and turned it in to the office to be sent into a state writing competition. An hour later, I was called to the office where the guidance counselor called my work "disturbing" and said I "need help". FML
Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML
Today, I was made aware that my teenage son used "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" as a reference point in a class debate as if it was a biopic. Oh dear. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with my parents. During a sex scene, my dad covered my eyes. I'm married and have 2 kids. FML
Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML
Today, my parents watched a horror movie with some creepy child in it. Apparently, I sound just like that kid when I call for my mom, so now she doesn't want me to call her mom anymore. FML
Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. A six year-old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were, he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year-old. FML
Today, I got called into the school by my daughter's teacher. Apparently my daughter informed her class that over the weekend she spent her time with her daddy watching porn stars while her mummy was at work. It took a long time to convince her they were actually watching a TV show called "Pawn Stars". FML
Today, a student told me to fuck off. I work with 3 year-olds. FML
Today, I got an angry call from my 7-year-old son's school. It turned out that while doing a "what I want to be when I'm older" assignment, he wrote that he wants to be an internet troll so he can make people mad and make them kill themselves. FML
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Top comments
Docbee 11
Either clear up the misunderstanding or go with the flow and see where it takes you, but if it takes you to a bigger flow... Run.
perdix 31
You should be suspicious if you are invited to Career Day -- and it's at the teacher's house at night. Bow-chicka-bow-bow.
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Comments (71)
ColbyGB 13
Little kids are the best..
noelasis94 18
That's to easy to throw a pun at so we'll just say wow now that's a classic I bet that teacher made a face like an adult film star
HannahLouise96 13
I'm sorry, what?
Rumbelle_fml 22
Apparently it's not as easy to pun over as you thought. Perhaps you might want to just revise the meaning of "pun", honey?
upallnight11 19
Smart kid.
lonerbitch 6
And after a little time, your kid will say "When i grow up i want to be like my mom".
Kitten_Calderon 14
Just clear it with your sons teacher.. My friends little sister had to do a similar project in elementary school, about what their parents liked, she put down her mom liked whiskey sours and the poor woman had to clarify she wasn't a drunk
lzmo 20
*adds to favorite*
vbmg152 19
You so deserve that!
FaygoAndMiracles 18
Care to explain why? I really don't see how OP deserved that.
hordriss 14
Oops. I think you may need to tell the teacher what you actually do, or those parent/teacher meetings could be a little awkward!
KiddNYC1O 22
Cha-ching!
iammeorami 25
haha "adult films"