By TooMuchAnxiety - 10/03/2015 08:03 - United States - Kailua

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked me to homecoming, in front of the whole school, knowing I have social anxiety. I was forced to say yes to not seem like an asshole. Now I can't back out. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 074
You deserved it 7 516

TooMuchAnxiety tells us more.

For everyone asking why we broke up, its because he was very manipulative and downright abusive behind closed doors. I can't back out because i'm afraid of what might happen if I do.

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Don't buy a dress, if he asks to see it, stall. On the day of homecoming, you're suddenly too sick to leave your bed! Problem solved

Or she can just tell him to fuck off for putting her in such a predicament.

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Don't buy a dress, if he asks to see it, stall. On the day of homecoming, you're suddenly too sick to leave your bed! Problem solved

Or she can just tell him to fuck off for putting her in such a predicament.

#21 Exactky. The FML says "Now I can't back out" but she definitely can. Even with anxiety I'm sure there's a solution.

#22, I completely agree; couldn't have said it better myself.

Don't show up. He's an ex for a reason. Don't even have to make an excuse. He wants to put you in a shitty situation, put him in one too.

That's actually worse. She should have just said no.

@57, no, HE shouldn't have manipulated her into saying yes. No blame falls on her in this situation.

It's not easy, at least for me. Saying 'no' or backing out even if you don't like the person is very hard. Poor OP if that was me I might start crying

I have anxiety too. I can tell you, sometimes there isn't.

trust me, anxiety of any kind is a total bitch. I'm 25 and i have seperation, social, and God knows what else. it's literally ruining my life and my marriage.

At least you didn't tell him what you actually thought, then you'd really sound like an ass.

I'm pretty sure OP made that clear in the fml. Her ex-boyfriend is a fucking coward and to another extent, a psychological bully. He knew he was putting her on the spot in front of the whole school to ensure he gets a yes.. he prolly knows about her anxiety problem too. I know a couple of girls who'd flip him the bird in front of the whole school and just bounce.

You shouldn't feel like you have to say yes. He's your ex for some reason, say no to the ass. If he was your boyfriend he had to have known about the anxiety.

It says that he knew about it; that's why he did it.

Ahh, I'm tired, I misread. Either way, OP, you should not feel obligated to say yes to an asshole. Say no. Make him look stupid! It won't make you look like a jerk.

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I agree completely 73

Sounds a little abusive if you ask me. How about sending him a message or talking to him in private to clear it out? Whatever you do, you better do it while you still can. Good luck.

It is manipulative and controlling. OP doesn't need that shit.

Despite your anxieties, there is no need to keep putting up with his nonsense. Send him a text message saying that you are not going with him, and call it a day! Enjoy being a free woman. Disregard what he says afterwards. He does not respect you, he was manipulative, over controlling, and clearly immature. He may have put you on the spot, but it's not too late for you to take control your life. He is in your past, so start enjoying the present. Good luck! :)

Not hard to see why he's your ex if he's willing to pull such a stunt. Definite FYL.

Your not the asshole OP, he is.

Message or text him on the day saying you're feeling sick and can't go. Or your parents say you can't go. Anything, just use any excuse you can think of, you don't have to go, he's an ex for a reason.

Why should she make any excuses up in the first place? If she doesn't want to go, shouldn't she just tell him she doesn't want to go?

She might not feel safe to do that. An excuse might help her say no easier.

well you actually can back out. just don't go. if somebody asks just say u weren't feeling well. easy peasy

Doubt anyone would ask. Not like OP is the only girl there and being that she has that bad of social anxiety, I doubt she'd be homecoming queen so she would go pretty unnoticed at the dance. Aside from the ex that is.

You can always back out.

Agreed. If he did it publicly to pressure you, knowing that you'd say no otherwise, then tell him you're not comfortable going with your ex.

Just go and have fun. It can be as fun as you make it.