Today, my dad and I had an hour-long conversation. When he was getting up to leave my room he said, "Good talk Chelsey." My sister is Chelsey. So I corrected him. He thought I was joking. My father can't tell my sister and I apart. We are not twins. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my father called me for the first time in two weeks since I moved away. Excited, I answered the phone. It was a mistake. He thought he'd called my sister. FML
Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML
Today, my dad was doing FaceTime with a friend. He turned his iPhone towards my sister and said, "There's my daughter…" He then turned it to me and said "…and there's my ugly son", then walked away. I'm still not sure if it's a joke or not. FML
Today, my dad introduced me to my half-sister. He'd only recently found out that he had another daughter by another woman, and had only just met her. She and I have been in the same class in school for the past three years. FML
Today, my dad learned a new way to annoy the family. Since watching some Twitch streamers that one time, he refers us as "chat." As in, "Chat, what should we have for dinner?" or "Hey chat, check out my fit. Yay or nay?" or even, "Chat, is that true?" FML
Today, my estranged, alcoholic father decided to tell me I have a sister. After 30 minutes of him describing how beautiful she is, how much we look alike, and how she has lived one town away from me her entire life, I was excited to the point of tears. Too bad she died a year ago. Thanks dad. FML
Today, my dad casually mentioned my half-sister in conversation. He had her out of wedlock when he was only 13. NEWS TO ME, HE'S NEVER MENTIONED I HAVE A HALF-SISTER BEFORE AND I'M FREAKING 22 YEARS-OLD. Apparently he and mom thought I knew, and just forgot to tell me. FML
Today, I found out that I've been calling my boyfriend's dad by the wrong name for the past two years. No one had told me sooner because they liked laughing at me for it when I wasn't around. FML
Today, I had a serious conversation with my dad about my brother and me. It started with, "I love you", and ended with,"You and your brother were mistakes." FML
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Top comments
HowieDoIt 21
Whatever, Chelsea. You won't fool me!
littlemonster94 15
This is when you do something really bad, and blame Chelsea.. "No dad, it was Chelsea!" *points sheepishly at unsuspecting sister*
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Comments (81)
perdix 29
You should hit him up for Chelsey's allowance. Later, hit him up for Anonymous's allowance and say you will give it to her. You may be the forgotten sister, so you may as well be the rich one!
apache316 6
Its going to be okay Chelsey
chelsearenaeee 16
Chelsea's are just more awesome than everyone else.
misslifeguard 7
Now we know who the favorite is
dabum18 5
My dad did the same thing. I am 6 years younger than my sister.
Epikouros 31
Sorry, Tiffonay!
TungstenLildog 10
Some people have a disorder where their brain cannot tell people apart based on faces. They don't always realize they have this problem because they find other ways of getting through life without knowing why some things are difficult. If you two have the same hair and voice, and he has this difficulty, he won't know which is which.
egggoop 3
For anyone who is interested, this is called prosopagnosia, or face blindness. It happens more often than anyone realizes. I actually have a friend with this, I have to tell her who I am every time I see her or she doesn't recognize me.
goldensnitch0011 4
You sure he wasn't sipping on beers during that talk?
gmian 34
my sister and me* sorry, guys.
doodlecloud 26
...was that supposed to be a joke?
gmian 34
It's my sister and me. Would you say, "he can't tell me apart.." or "he can't tell I apart"?
jej1997 2
I'm glad a fellow grammar pedant pointed this out so I didn't have to. Bravo!
doodlecloud 26
You wouldn't say either...you'd say 'he can't tell me from..' or 'he can't tell us apart'. You can't 'tell someone apart'.
doodlecloud 26
But when you're talking about both people then yes, you can say that and yes, it would be 'my sister and me'. I wasn't trying to have a go at you, was genuinely just trying to work out if you were joking or not.
gmian 34
53, yeah, I know, but I was just trying to put it in the exact context of the FML.
doodlecloud 26
It's fine, I was just a bit too literal at first, sorry. :)
Mcc_06 2
I know how you feel my father does the same thing and also confuses me with my brothers. I don't even look like a dude.