Today, my coworker, who has a tendency to overshare, decided to tell me she has chlamydia. I threw my hands in the air and said, "Stop. I don't wanna know." A customer heard this exchange and we were both written up. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Asshat walking
Today, a random customer at work admonished my coworker for being on her phone. During our lunch break. As he walked away, my coworker muttered, "What the fuck is his problem?" I nodded in agreement. He heard her and saw me nodding. As did our boss. Time to get written up. FML
Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML
Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've been seeing. He confessed that he gave me chlamydia. FML
Let it out
Today, I was working when I delivered the standard "Hello, how are you?" to a customer. He took the opportunity to tell me about his deceased wife, his estranged children, and his anal tearing. After a while, I tried to help someone else, and he complained to my manager. I was written up. FML
Fanny flutters
Today, I was stuck with a coworker all morning while she had the "front farts." I moved to a different area after lunch, only to have another coworker start talking loudly about her boyfriend's skin tags, and how he likes to have her bite them off. I'm so disgusted but afraid to report it. FML
Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML
NDA FML
Today, a coworker told me something I didn't realize was confidential, until later when my boss called me, saying someone may have shared something confidential with me, and me, not thinking so, said I don't think anyone did. We hung up, they called back and elaborated, and it dawned on me now they think I'm a liar. FML
Customer relationships
Today, I assisted a customer at work. She was asking me all sorts of stupid questions and acting like an entitled, spoiled brat. When she left, since I had a mask on, I meant to mouth, "Stupid bitch" but I blurted it out loud. Everyone heard. I was fired. FML
Germ warfare
Today, I accidentally scanned a customer’s item twice. Before I could take it off, she quickly leaned over the counter and coughed on me. Repeatedly. FML
Coworker from hell
Today, I was studying my anatomy book for nursing school while in the break room at my day job. My nosy-ass, ignorant coworker who always finds a way to butt into everyone’s business told the front office I was looking at porn. I got written up for, "displaying offensive materials." FML
Top comments
skippydoda 32
Yeah. If there is an HR department, it's time to pay a visit them.
Tarlachia 33
I wonder exactly was the complaint given? "Oh my God! I heard that one has Chlamydia and probably gave it to that person! Think of the virgin ears of my poor children!!"
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Comments (39)
geekpower_fml 28
Maybe information isn't the only thing she over shares...
EarlFug 19
I like to think the workplace is a drive-thru: "Would you like some chlamydia with that?"
TheLastCenturion 19
Why did YOU get written up? That's really stupid. Explain what happened to HR.
PhoenixChick 26
What did your write-up say, exactly? "heard co-worker say something inappropriate, didn't immediately set them on fire as per store policy"?
Ninja_Alchemist 2
why would she say that within customer earshot? it's unfair that you got written up too!