Thank you for the ever-wise insight, 64, as your input is always appreciated and never fucking annoying due to your Captain Obvious-esque remarks. She is indeed moving out, by the way.

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Or start looking for a new roommate..

You supplied food, thereby raising your status in the pack. Feeling threatened, your alpha roommate has merely expressed her wish to reacertain her dominance by marking her territory- which includes you and all of your possessions. I suggest you puff yourself up as much as possible and maintain silent, steady eye contact with her. She may be stronger than you now, but if you seem threatening enough she won't want to fight you. Then, and only then, will you be able to live peacefully beside her within the confines of your lands.

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Or start looking for a new roommate..

I'd love to see a flatmate interview that starts with: "are you housebroken?"

I would move out or kick her out

Thank you for the ever-wise insight, 64, as your input is always appreciated and never fucking annoying due to your Captain Obvious-esque remarks. She is indeed moving out, by the way.

^ This. I wish I could give this a thumbs up.

Hopefully a better roommate will soon arrive. All a matter of luck with who you get.

She's marking her territory. You better start doing the same.

That's your roommate's way of telling you: "Don't worry I'll only act like this for nine months"

Get in there first!

You mean out of there, right? That roommate sounds batshit crazy and OP needs to get out of there and find a new roomie.

Get her a doggie pee pad. With any luck this will solve your problem.

Negative. Op should buy a rug and say she loves it, place it outside. Thus, sorting the problem. In all seriousness though, I'd be getting out of there in a second.

Tell her you love her. That'll teach her.

Yes, moseby the shit out of her

10- Haha, yes! "The Ted Mosby" is guarenteed to work.

Sounds like she needs a nap..... Or start putting Xanax in her meal...

how is it that everyone has insane roommates...

It's not that everyone has an insane roommate. You just never hear about the good ones. Especially not on FML

Its better to be pissed off than.... on second thought, RUN, OP!

I hate ungrateful bastards... and crazy people. But most of all, I hate the combination of both.

You supplied food, thereby raising your status in the pack. Feeling threatened, your alpha roommate has merely expressed her wish to reacertain her dominance by marking her territory- which includes you and all of your possessions. I suggest you puff yourself up as much as possible and maintain silent, steady eye contact with her. She may be stronger than you now, but if you seem threatening enough she won't want to fight you. Then, and only then, will you be able to live peacefully beside her within the confines of your lands.

That was quite an answer. it sounds surprisingly legit to me ..

I'll keep that in mind, thanks.

I've had to do this once before as well