By Keladrylady - 18/04/2015 00:47 - New Zealand - Auckland

Spicy
Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 147
You deserved it 3 517

Keladrylady tells us more.

OP here, My bf happened to be half asleep and as such is rather blond when so. (So no, he doesn't need sex ed as it has little to do with this topic per say). Him squeezing me whilst on my period has been a discussion point over the 6yrs we've been together, as yes, if done right, literally (TMI) squeezes out (insert words) and I really hate it, (guys, think of it as similar feeling to wetting yourself accidentally, it's a really yuck feeling). Thanks though for your comments and FYL's. :3 you've made us both laugh til our cheeks were sore. So again Thanks.

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Obviously that wouldn't work. You have to smack the bottom until it all comes out.

If your boyfriend honestly thought that would work, he is obviously not an Heinzstein... (sorry, that was terrible)

Comments

Well ? did it work? I'm sorry OP, hope the squeeze didn't harm your ribs. talk to him, educate him, tell him this could make it last longer.

Obviously that wouldn't work. You have to smack the bottom until it all comes out.

He should start smacking the top of her head then, right?

In a sense, you may Have been a ketchup bottle...

Wait that's not the way to make it end quicker? Damn I need a new plan.

If your boyfriend honestly thought that would work, he is obviously not an Heinzstein... (sorry, that was terrible)

No that was a brilliant pun. Wear it with pride!

Bleedin' heck! Most guys aren't well educated about those matter are they?

Is that supposed to be a pg version of "bloody hell"?

UK version, I reckon.

This would happen in New Zealand wouldn't it

I don't follow...

#7 Your powers of deduction astound me.

She's not stating that it happened in New Zealand. Put emphasis on WOULD. Like "Out of all the places in the entire world this WOULD happen in New Zealand."

I used to think taking the shower head and running water up there would help clear it out faster lol

Men usually mask their soft side. He probably knew you needed a hug and gave you one without his intention in plain view.

Cleverly masked by his facade of idiocy.

wait... that doesn't work?

Your profile pic XD