Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a soccer game when some guys walking behind me yelled that I had a nice ass. I then heard someone shout, "Hey, assholes. That's my daughter." He yelled at them for quite a while. He wasn't my dad, just some weird dude. FML
Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML
Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML
Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML
Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML
Today, I was in the bank with my seven year-old daughter, when I saw an old high school friend of mine with his wife. I said hello, and he commented on how beautiful my little girl was. I thanked him, and as I turned away, I heard his wife say, "I guess the father must be the good looking one." FML
Today, my father and I were out in town when a lady walked up and commented on what a great looking couple we were. My dad puts his arm around me and says, "Thank you! We've been together for 17 years." FML
Today, I was at a ballet recital with my friend, sitting between her and the mother of the head male ballerina. When he came on stage in obscenely tight white tights I whispered to my friend, "You can see his whole freaking package!" I'd whispered to the wrong side. FML
Today, my dad was completely engrossed in a football game on TV, so, trying to be cute and funny, my mom flashed him. He didn't notice, but I did. FML
Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML
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Top comments
umidontrember 14
Well, at least he knew his son had a good butt.
Fuaaad1994 31
He then got up and asked if he has a nice butt too. Like father like son (or daughter)
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Comments (89)
Xotoolyxo 16
Got it from his daddy
sarah2144 14
It's not that big of a deal. At least you didn't say "I want to suck number 33's dick" or something like that.
therealjc_fml 14
You should have thanked him for it!
liaRawr 9
Great dad aha but embarrassing for you
Pinkfun69 4
So with you sitting behind #33 did Dad give baby #33 a run for the money?
Muttley9 13
The phrase that has caused humanity the most issues over the ages besides "**** you!" is probably "Nice ass!" :)
142_cats 13
At least your dad knows you have a cute butt OP.
3DG30FGL0RY 9
OP was looking at #33.
kurrrrtcocaine 3
It's not like he knows who you are.
krimeano 4
I hope you are girl
xDovahkiin 12
I don't see how this is an FML. So what if someone overheard your compliment? At least you weren't complimenting his package.