Animals: Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said,... - FML

By queenmeme - 08/10/2014 06:02 - United States - Redlands

Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said, "Wait, sloths are real?" She thought Ice Age made them up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 363

You deserved it 3 725

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Same thing different taste

By faceless_sailor8 - 31/08/2011 16:25 - United States

Today, my wife compared me to Sid the sloth from Ice Age. Same smile, same eyes, same belly, same big feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 679

You deserved it 5 728

By Redhead4life - 18/03/2012 00:48 - United States - Miami

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 871

You deserved it 2 872

Cuteness overload

By friend - 29/06/2012 20:48 - Israel - Rishon Le Zion

Today, I was babysitting a little girl, and we were playing with dolls. After we fed her babies, we put them down for a nap. After a few minutes, I asked if they'd had enough sleep. She looked at me like I was a freak and said, "Uh, they're not real babies, you know…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 719

You deserved it 3 677

By Granmacathy - 29/11/2009 07:13 - United States

Today, my grandson asked how old I am and whether I'd seen Mammoths "for real" when I was a kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 079

You deserved it 4 500

By OutoftheLoop - 20/02/2009 09:24 - China

Today, I returned home from college and saw a framed picture of my parents and my younger sister on an elephant in an exotic jungle. I pointed to the picture and asked my mom, "Is this some photoshop job?" She responded, "No, we went to Thailand for a family trip, didn't we tell you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 413

You deserved it 3 647

Remember the TV show "V"?

By Sarah Lyn - 24/06/2019 04:59

Today, I saw the cutest baby watching a show with my Dad. After commenting how cute she was, my Dad goes on to say, "Yeah, most babies are cute. Except you, you looked like a lizard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 708

You deserved it 233

By kimm1993 - 03/08/2013 04:29 - United States - Chicago

Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 689

You deserved it 8 459

By riiiighhhttttt - 05/08/2013 05:38 - United States - Laurel

Today, I actually had to explain to my sister that Shrek was not in fact based on a true story. She replied that I'm a "clueless twat". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 692

You deserved it 4 348

By fatty - 03/08/2010 22:37 - United States

Today, my family and I watched Madagascar 2. When we got to the part where Gloria the hippopotamus is praised for her chunkyness, my little sister looked at me and said, "If you were a hippo, maybe then you would get a date." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 152

You deserved it 7 416

Nosaurus

By bibi - 19/03/2012 23:43 - Slovenia - Ljubljana

Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 630

You deserved it 2 687

Next

Top comments

chrissapp 18

Wednesday 8 October 2014 17:56

She's going places.

azyjazy713 11

Wednesday 8 October 2014 17:57

I forgot all my good sloth jokes. But too bad your mom was a little slow on that fact.

Comments

Pleonasm 35

Wednesday 8 October 2014 18:11

Convince her that saber tooth tigers and wooly mammaths still exist too.

kinky44 28

Wednesday 8 October 2014 18:18

She's a little slow.

littlekellilee 45

Wednesday 8 October 2014 21:28

So is your posting of this joke.

xxcaitlannxx 15

Wednesday 8 October 2014 18:33

I thought that for the longest when I was little

stupidipod 5

Wednesday 8 October 2014 18:42

She's going places, not college, but places

ksuth 25

Wednesday 8 October 2014 21:30

Only took me 24 hours to get tired of this comment... saw it so much on here today :(

max_1000000 11

Wednesday 8 October 2014 18:43

Could've been sarcasm? Hopefully..

itwontvalidate 18

Wednesday 8 October 2014 19:04

can you really blame her, sloths look like they come straight from a cartoon

Sakuraashita 15

Wednesday 8 October 2014 20:35

She must have sloths and ground sloths confused, (when I was little I had a similar misconception only I thought they were extinct not made up), ground sloths were from the ice age and are what Sid is supposed to be, although I think they were actually quite a bit larger. Those sloths are extinct, but the modern (three-toed, correct me if I'm wrong) is still alive.

jeriaslovesyou 16

Wednesday 8 October 2014 20:49

What a smart woman.

birdybirdchirp 18

Wednesday 8 October 2014 21:24

well lets hope this apple falls far from the tree.

hannahgreely 14

Wednesday 8 October 2014 22:07

was she feeling....philoSLOTHical?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I came back home after a year studying abroad. Imagine my surprise when I found out my mom had gotten breast implants while I was away. All through dinner, I kept catching myself staring at them. No wonder my dad was so much happier than when I left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 776

You deserved it 5 102

Today, as my husband normally initiates sex and sometimes I want to but always chicken out, I was feeling brave and did so. After he came, he continued working on me and I farted. I embarrassingly apologized and he said it was ok and kept going. I then continued to fart, and I had to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 390

You deserved it 277

The Top

Today, my dishes smelled so perfume-y after going through the dishwasher and a clean glass of water tasted soapy. I checked the pods my husband bought and loaded into the dishwasher to make sure we never got that brand again. They were laundry detergent pods. I was essentially a millennial eating a Tide Pod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 278

You deserved it 277

Today, my girlfriend is giving me the silent treatment because I won’t play Call of Duty with her brother. This kid loses his temper violently at family board games, how the fuck does she think he’ll react when he gets mercilessly wiped out by COD players who don’t give a toss about his feelings? FML

I agree, your life sucks 988

You deserved it 116

Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 026

You deserved it 8 971

Today, I discovered that I don't have Herpes or Genital warts. I have acne on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 882

You deserved it 9 402

Today, waking up I noticed that my female boss had texted me during the night, telling me she wants me bad. I'm a woman, happily married to a man, and now have to turn her down somehow and not get fired in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 214

You deserved it 3 365

Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 916

You deserved it 3 459