By Kaibel - 21/05/2016 21:39 - United States - Los Angeles
Kaibel tells us more.
Hey guys, OP here! Let me give you guys a little back story on the situation: I found out about this because I went on holiday with my best friend, which meant I would be leaving home for the first time WITHOUT my parents ever. On the sixth day, my face broke out horribly and I was feeling very nauseas. When my parents called to check up on me (since I was away in another state) I told them I had been feeling sick all day. One thing led to another, and they eventually confessed what they have been doing all these years (I'm 17 now). My reaction? Yeah, I was pretty pissed off. I hung up on my parents and literally threw my phone against the bed. The sad thing is, when I get really mad I cry, so there were a lot of tears involved as well. I've never had a real boyfriend or anything like that, so I have no idea why they did this. I'm going to see a doctor once I get back home, but until then, I'm going to ignore the calls and texts my parents send me. Thank you guys for all the support c':
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Are they completely insane? Birth control can be dangerous, with many side-effects, it's the kind of thing you absolutely have to check with a doctor (for the dosage, number of days a month you take it, aftercare, etc). They're out of their minds. Plus, what if you already were taking it in secret? It'd be double dose!
Exactly! I have a hereditary blood clotting disorder which I only discovered I had 2 years ago, and the Pill can trigger it/make worse. I was on the Pill since I was 14 and I found out I had the disorder when I was 20! If you're old enough and have a job, move out ASAP! Parents are there to protect you, not jeopardise your health and make you take medication without your permission, or knowledge, because they're afraid you'll get pregnant! As shit as it would be getting pregnant in your teens, at least you'll probably be okay...What if you had been taking the Pill and you had a underlying heart condition/blood pressure problem or other disorder?! I wouldn't be cool with this at all, OP!
or what if she skipped drinking the orange juice for a day and she missed the pill? that'll throw you through a loop and a half.
This is very true, hormonal based medications can cause severe mood changes and even suicidal thoughts, and can some other horrific side effects, like seizures and secere abdominal pains. I see no reason for them to slip you the pill? If they were scared you were having sex then why wouldn't they just talk to you and suggest you start taking the pill if you are having sex?
Number of days a month you take it? Who doesn't take all the pills in a pack?
To be fair, pregnancy can and often is life threatening, especially for a young teen. But that's no excuse for inflicting medical abuse on your child and ******* with their reproductive development instead of having a goddamn conversation with them about sex.
Um... The people who have the three weeks on / one week off type of BC? The last week still has pills but they're just sugar pills, and are only there to help you remember to take it at the same time every day.... You realize there's more than just ONE type of birth control pill, right....? :/.....
Pregnancy is no more life-threatening to a teen than it is to a 25 year old... Unless you're talking about preteens (like 12/13), in which case body size is what makes it dangerous. What's more dangerous is older people having children so close to menopause.... It's dangerous for the woman AND the baby, and has a way higher incidence of retardation and genetic mutations....
What are you even saying
#128, the last week of the pills are iron pills, usually brown, as you need more iron while you gush blood out of your lady parts.
@129 you are mistaken about the teens thing. My sixteen year old coworker just had a baby, there where tons of health concerns because of her body not being quite ready.
your parents are mental or what?!
They shouldn't have done that! What kind of parents are they?
Insane parents! With all side effects that is very dangerous to play with the hormone levels of a 13 year old! Back in the 80ies one of my classmates unfortunately had unsubscribed hormonal medicine given to her at around age of 15 and her brain couldn't handle it, she ended her life (already, while most of the classmates enjoy their lives fully) in mental clinic (sorry if the place is politically correctly called different, English is not my native language, but I hope you get the idea).
Your English is great! We usually say mental health hospital/clinic, so you're good :)
On top of the fact that it can cause blood clots(she wouldn't know to look out for the signs if the doctors never told her) and complete permanent infertility if taken for a lot of years.
They are insane. I don't know if there's anything you can do legally but if there is make sure it's done because that's not cool at all
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Show it anywayNowadays? You haven't heard of the Sexual Revolution in the 60's, no? Everyone literally had sex with everyone back then and there was **** all contraception too, so the amount of teenage pregnancies between 1960 to the mid 1990s' was rampant - Way more than "nowadays". As for not blaming her parents for making her take potentially dangerous medication without the OP's knowledge, you're just as insane as the parents and I'm concerned for your (future) offspring!!
No need to be rude, #6. I may have used the wrong wording and not agree with you but that doesn't make me insane
Lol, no your wording was just fine. I'm just in shock and horror that someone thinks what the parents have done is okay because kids, not SOME kids, are having sex like rabbits and this is a brand new concept, apparently...
Obviously, I think what they did is wrong but I also can't blame them. People can become irresponsible when it comes to sex. Everyone said why they did blame them, I'm saying why I don't
They are her parents. They are concerned. They don't want her getting pregnant. Btw, I have not gotten this from the media, ffs. My sister is 13 and her friends range from 12-15. Most of them have either had sex, or had sex and gotten pregnant
If you think your child might be sexually active, you discuss birth control with them. You discuss consent and STDs and safe sex to make sure your child has the best information. You don't just start giving them medication without their knowledge. The pill doesn't protect against pregnancy if the dosage is wrong and doesn't protect against venereal diseases - it's like they skipped out on the whole 'consent' issue ...
But, what if the kid lies and says they aren't having sex, but you've still got that bad feeling in your gut or you know for a fact?
Then that means the parents did a bad job of opening up communication with their child. If a child is unable to open up and tell the truth and be honest with their parents then there's probably a good reason for it.
If you know for a fact, then present them with that fact. If you have a "gut feeling", do consider the radical suggestion that you might be wrong. Or are you psychic? Slipping your kid birth control is just lazy and implies you can't be bothered to talk to them and educate them on the subject. If you're not feeling up to parenting properly, don't become a parent. Which, incidentally, is what many people should do.
Yup plus if you really think your child doesn't trust you enough to open up about their sex life, you go with them to a doctor so they can talk with someone who won't get all hysterical about it and make sure if they want to take something that it's safe for them and they're taking the right option. You can absolutely blame the parents, you have to teach your children to be responsible with their sexual health, taking the responsibility out of their hands isn't going to teach them anything.
Oh yeah, it's always the parents' fault. Btw, go back and read my other comments. I also said "For a fact"
So you don't believe facts? Cause it's a fact people having sex at that age isn't new at all. If you can't believe facts, then it's pointless to try to talk with you.
I will say this for the last time and if everyone thinks I'm wrong, I don't care. Because I'm right. Her parents are not insane, they are concerned and rightly so. You think teenage pregnancy is okay? Then you guys are insane. Not me or them. Now, shut up and really think about things. Think about the situation
You are wrong. Medicating someone without there knowledge is never the right thing to do. It's dangerous & almost impossible to watch for many of the more subtle side effects. No one is saying that she should be getting pregnant now. She should just be using some form of contraceptives by her own will & under the care of a doctor. Also people today are no more sexual than they were in the 60s or 80s, the media just blows it out of proportion, like #10 said. There are quantifiable facts to prove this.
You did not answer my question. I spoke of you trying to deny that teens have always had sex at young ages. No, I don't think teens should get pregnant but teens also have rights. If you're worried, make sure your child is fully informed and if you're concerned she's trying to get pregnant than try to explain and show her what it's actually like. There's absolutely no excuse for this.
And this isn't a medication that could save her life or help a condition. Maybe I could understand then. This is a total optional medication that still has affects on health and can conflict with other medications. She had no knowledge of taking it and could have gotten prescribed something that conflicts with it or started secretly taking her own birth control and could have had a serious reaction.
You can say they're concerned parents, sure, but they went about "protecting" their daughter the absolute wrong way. If they were really that concerned about her having sex and getting pregnant, they should've just had a conversation with her about safe sex, talked about contraceptive options, and maybe offered to take her to the doctor to get a prescription if she wanted one. All they did was put her at risk. The side effects and hormones in birth control on such a young person? I can't even begin. They just were lazy and irresponsible, in my opinion.
Social media and teen mom only make it more obvious these days. It was actually worse 20-30 years ago than it is today.
DoomedGemini, you're misinterpreting some of what IWillEatYouAlive is trying to say. They never denied teen sex was more common in the past. Saying there's too much happening today doesn't mean it wasn't worse before, just that it's still bad. Also, just because teen pregnancy rates are going down overall doesn't mean it's an even rate nation-wide. Maybe OP lives in an area that has a really high rate, & maybe she was one of those 12 year olds that tries to look 16 & talked about sex with her friends but screamed if her parents ever tried to mention it. Children are not necessarily reasonable, and certainly at that age shouldn't be trusted to remember to take a daily pill 3 weeks out the month on their own. Maybe her parents did try everything else they could think of & OP resisted or lied. Yes, it's entirely possible there could've been serious negative side effects, but those are not exactly common and OP's parents apparently judged 13-year-old mom as the worst scenario available (especially if you consider that very young childbirth can be fatal). Not saying it's right, just not surprising, & we don't know the circumstances.
You're being ridiculous. There is absolutely no reason to slip someone drugs without their knowledge. To go on the pill, you need to have a consultation with a professional to decide what kind to go on, due to the possible side effects and complications. It was an awful thing for her parents to do.
No shut up, you dun goofed. Accept it
@55 No, there is still no reason to do this. Yes, childbirth at 13 can be fatal, but so can taking this kind of medication without knowledge. And if a child is walking out of the house looking that much older and can't have a conversation with her parents then that is completely the parents fault. I will not blame the parents for everything, if a kid is having sex without the parents knowing that is not necessarily their fault. Peer pressure is a thing and at certain ages kids are more influenced by their friends than by their parents. But if you can't even talk to your kid about safe sex for whatever reason, that is 100% your fault. This was a lazy and irresponsible thing for the parents to do, no matter the situation.
So, where in the FML did OP say they were even having sex in the first place? Parents deciding to medicate their child against their consent and while having HAD to lie to a doctor to get the medication under false pretense because they ASSUMED their child is doing something risky and didn't want to ask? Wow, if that's not surprising to you, I'm scared for you, your life must be full of scary stuff.
You don't even have to ever have sex to be taking birth control. They can talk to their kid about it without the kid ever admitting to having sex, whether they have yet or not. I started birth control when I was still a virgin at 14, mostly because of how painful my cramps were. There are other reasons and benefits for birth control than just to prevent pregnancies.
Thank you 89! I have been looking through the comments and you seem to be the first to note that birth control can be used to help with things other than preventing pregnancies! I have a friend who has been on it since age 12 because of debilitating cramps and irregular periods. You get it and I thank you very much for that
You're wrong, ignorant, and stupid. No one said teen pregnancy is ok, no one should be having sex at that age anyway. You do realize that birth control can cause many side effects right? The parents are basically making their child sick because they are too lazy to tell them that they shouldn't have sex at that age. Chances are she wasn't even having sex and the birth control probably caused bad side effects.
Ok listen right now idiot, OP is 17 now and has been on this medication for 4 years now. She hasn't had a boyfriend meaning she hasn't been in a sexual relationship. So there goes your entire argument, OP's parents should have just talked to her about sex. Anyway, she went on a vacation with her best friend, and without her parents. Her parents didn't even tell her what they've been doing before she left. So on the 6th day after she left she got extremely nauseous and started to break out. So when she talked to her parents and said she wasn't feeling well that's how she found out. So OP's parents put her on BC without consent for literally no reason, didn't tell her about it when she was going to go on vacation(which they should have because as you know she can get very sick from being off it randomly), but they didn't even think about the fact that she would become very sick without being on it after so long, so they caused her to become pretty sick, didn't tell her about it at all until it was too late, and they put her on it for no reason. So how do you justify someone putting their child at risk when there wasn't even a reason to in the first place?
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Show it anywayResponsible and loving parents do not secretly dose their kid with medicine like that. They sit down and talk with the kid about the importance of using contraception if they're going to have sex. A doctor determines the best pill for the girl and gives her guidance on taking it properly. And what if she needed to use antibiotics? Do the parents realize that that will nullify the pill? Sheesh.
IWillEatYouAlive is going to become one of those parents who forces their kids to drink gallons of water a day to "stay healthy and hydrated" and then have them die of overhydration/water poisoning
Yes, please tell us how ****** up our kids will be for us respecting consent, respecting their right to their body, not secretly forcing them to take a total optional drug, and risk their health and life. Because doing the opposite shows you are obviously such a great parent!
But, #89 & 107, you/your friend KNEW what you were taking. The key being, YOU KNEW!
So you're saying that abusing your child and causing them to become severely ill is a good thing?
You do realize that OP's parents caused her to become ill and could have potentially caused her death right? You also realize that OP hasn't had a boyfriend before right? She was put on a medication they can cause damage for literally no reason.
No no no, you're the one that is going to have ****** up children if you honestly believe drugging them, and risking their health is acceptable. You're completely insane if you think that's ok, go sit down with a doctor and tell them you think this is ok and see what they say. After being off it for almost a week OP got sick, how can you say that's good parenting? They risked her life because they were afraid to talk to to her. It's a lot easier to talk to your kids then to risk their health because you're too chicken shit to actually speak to them. If you think this is good parenting don't be shocked when your kid ends up in the hospital all because you refused to speak with them. The fact that you think it's better to drug your children then talk to them tell me you should never have children and if you do don't be shocked when they stop talking to you after they move out. I don't say this lightly but the fact that you refuse to see reason tells me you'd be a TERRIBLE parent, for the love of god never breed.
#19, could've been the mom's prescription that she slipped to her daughter. which is even worse cause the dr might have given such a young teen a much lower hormone dosage or something.
whoops, meant to put that on another comment
Are you kidding me?? That's so dangerous. Your parents are insane
Honestly, this is horrifying and probably child abuse (even if you are no longer a child). Please go to a doctor and be aware that it is possible your parents have been doing other things too. Take care OP.
For that matter, get a new doctor, because apparently the one that she has thinks it's appropriate to prescribe medication without examining the patient or discussing the prescription afterwards with the person taking it for potential side effects, etc. If that's the case, tat doctor should probably have their license called into question.
That's incredibly dangerous. They'd have probably been safer slipping condoms in instead.
Orange juice would taste a bit funny with condoms in it.
Safer, but OP could have/develop a latex allergy.
Because we all know you develop allergies by consuming the item(s) in question, lolololollllz.......
I developed an allergy to pain from repeated exposure. It hurts me.
Yes, you do...frequent exposure can cause your body to develop an allergic reaction. The more you know!
That's messed up. It could interact with other medication or alcohol, there are side effects, it can effect your ability to have kids when you do come off it... If they're that concerned they should talk to you about it. Hell, I'd go as far as calling that child abuse. 13 is too young for that if there isn't a doctor monitoring it.
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Are they completely insane? Birth control can be dangerous, with many side-effects, it's the kind of thing you absolutely have to check with a doctor (for the dosage, number of days a month you take it, aftercare, etc). They're out of their minds. Plus, what if you already were taking it in secret? It'd be double dose!
Insane parents! With all side effects that is very dangerous to play with the hormone levels of a 13 year old! Back in the 80ies one of my classmates unfortunately had unsubscribed hormonal medicine given to her at around age of 15 and her brain couldn't handle it, she ended her life (already, while most of the classmates enjoy their lives fully) in mental clinic (sorry if the place is politically correctly called different, English is not my native language, but I hope you get the idea).