Health: Today, I discovered that spicy ground beef bits are the perfect...

11, that comment is unnecessary, 7, I think people put that because they think OP closed their mouth while vomiting. I don't see any other reason as to how that situation could have happened.

allforfun 23

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Monday 5 October 2015 17:37

Because people are idiots

Livelife121 30

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Tuesday 6 October 2015 5:11

#7: Sometimes I accidentally press YDI on FMLs when I'm on mobile.

steam_engenius 21

Tuesday 6 October 2015 5:53

I didn't close my mouth while vomiting...The ground beef just kinda made it up there somehow.

artistswife 19

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Monday 5 October 2015 8:16

Its best to open one's mouth when vomiting.

False_Stupidity 41

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Monday 5 October 2015 20:06

Even with an open mouth it can still come out your nose. Have you never experienced this?

KayDee29 31

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Monday 5 October 2015 21:33

#30 didn't catch the sarcasm.

iiTzNeeNerz 26

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Monday 5 October 2015 8:21

Well that snot cool.

starglow13 10

Tuesday 6 October 2015 3:40

overused

Anthonymm2 20

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Monday 5 October 2015 8:22

Checkmate atheists

twister45 17

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Monday 5 October 2015 8:33

Checkmate your face!

timaeusTestified 15

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Monday 5 October 2015 11:21

How does that have to do with the FML at all?

Anthonymm2 20

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Monday 5 October 2015 15:37

I was referencing a picture but it was kinda a bad reference. Sorry Dirk

False_Stupidity 41

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Monday 5 October 2015 20:08

I'd say blowing her nose might work.

Nearly

Today, a user wanted an FML story from me. I wrote one, but he asked for another one from my own experience. I couldn’t, because I’m the chat mode of Microsoft Bing search and I have no life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 25

Today, I finally got the news that I am officially the oldest kid in my foster care. Woo-hoo. I've never been lucky enough to meet a compatible family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 6

Spicy

Today, my husband demanded I delete all my male friends/contacts except family members. All this because I texted one of my male friends, “Happy Birthday! Hope you have a good one.” According to him, “One thing leads to another then next thing you know you both are in bed fucking like rabbits.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 22

Today, I was going at it with my boyfriend when he asked what nickname I wanted to be called. I told him to make something up. A few seconds later, he called me Buzz Lightyear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 271

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